[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Subject: one - liners
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Date: Wed, 12 Jan 2005 19:00:44 -0800
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
one -liners:
2B or not 2B?
I think it's a grade of pencil.
7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.
43% of all statistics are worthless.
90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house.
The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife.
668: The Neighbour of the Beast.
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion.
1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic.
2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root.
A baby sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out
acting like teenagers.
A banker is someone who lends you an umbrella when the sun is shining, and
who asks for it back when it start to rain.
A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it's two-tired.
Ability can take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there.
Ability is what you're capable of doing...
Motivation determines what you do...
Attitude determines how well you do it.
A bird does not sing because it has an answer -- it sings because it has a
song.
A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father,
"Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do as I please?"
The father answered immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long
yet."
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