Political Humor
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Here's why according to some famous local personalities:
President GMA: Hello Garci. Alamin mo nga kung bakit tumawid ang chicken.
Sec Gonzales - That Chicken is a an aberration and belongs to a ranting widow. She (the chicken) is too beautiful to be run over as it crosses the road.
Former Comelec Commissioner Virgilio Garcillano: Sige po ma'am. Gagawan natin ng paraan. Ipapakidnap ko ang mga sisiw.
Susan Roces: Let us remain calm. Let us follow the rule of law in determining the chicken's motive for crossing the road.
Former President Joseph Estrada: Ako na naman? Pati ba naman pagtawid ng manok, sa akin isisisi?
Press Secretary Ignacio Bunye: That chicken which allegedly crossed the road is a fake. We have the real chicken in our
coop!
Sen. Ping Lacson: I have asked a foreign group to authenticate the taxonomic classification of that animal which crossed the road. No doubt, it was indeed a chicken.
Former Sen. Kit Tatad: I did my own authentication. The chicken is real.
Bro. Mike Velarde: Tiyak 'yon.
NBI Director Reynaldo Wycoco: Both chickens are fake.
Archbishop Oscar Cruz: I have witnesses to prove that the chicken crossed the road.
Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Blog: We have the complete audio and video of the chicken crossing the road. Download here.
Atty. Allan Paguia: I admit! I spliced the chicken but only for my post-graduate class. I didn't fry it. In fact it's Still alive.
Cong. Chiz Escudero: Once and for all, I am challenging the chicken. The public is waiting for its answer. Did it cross
The road or not. If yes, why? If no, I still won't believe it.
Atty. Samuel Ong: It was looking for its mother. But the chicken won't find it because I am keeping the mother of all
chickens.
Sgt. Vidal Doble: It was forced to cross the road.
Sen. Aquilino Pimentel: Impeach the chicken!
Bayan Muna Rep. Teddy Casio: The chicken has betrayed the motorists' trust when it crossed the road. Fry it!
Sandra Cam: The chicken has laid dozens of chicken eggs across the road. I was personally asked by the chicken - which happened to be my close friend - to deliver the eggs to Congressmen Mikey and Iggy Arroyo. But please, do not insinuate that I had a special relationship with the chicken. It was just a friend.
Cong. Mikey Arroyo: That chicken is a liar! I never received a single egg from that animal.
Cong. Ignacio Arroyo: I will file a libel case against the chicken!
NTC Commissioner: That's fowl. You should not discuss that on air. Else, we shall revoke your franchise.
KBP: Fowl or not, the NTC's circular is curtailment of press freedom.
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