Obituary of Common Sense
Today
we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has
been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since
his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will
be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing
when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life
isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common
Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than
you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are
in charge).
His
health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old
boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens
suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher
fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common
Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they
themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It
declined even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a
student, but could not inform the parents when a student became
pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common
Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband;
churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment
than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't
defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue
you for assault.
Common
Sense finally gave up after a woman failed to realize that a steaming
cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was
promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common
Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife,
Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is
survived by three newly found relatives: I Know my Rights, Someone Else
is to Blame, and I'm a Victim.
Not
many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you
still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do
nothing.
