Reviewer: Tim Evens Review result: Ready with Nits I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments.
For more information, please see the FAQ at <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. Document: draft-ietf-6tisch-enrollment-enhanced-beacon-?? Reviewer: Tim Evens Review Date: 2020-01-15 IETF LC End Date: 2020-01-22 IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat Summary: Overall looks good with some minor nits. Major issues: None Minor issues: None Nits/editorial comments: In section 1.2, "These slots are rare, and with 10ms slots, with a slot-frame length of 100, there may be only 1 slot/s for the beacon." IMO, this could be reworded to increase clarity. For example, "Considering 10ms slots and a slot-frame length of 100, these slots are rare and could result in only 1 slot for a beacon." In section 1.3, "At layer 3, [RFC4861] defines a mechanism by which nodes learn about routers by listening for multicasted Router Advertisements (RA)." Would it be possible to reword to not use "multicasted?" For example, "by receiving multicast Router Advertisements (RA)." "no RA is heard within a set time, then a Router Solicitation (RS) may be multicast," "may be sent as multicast" might be more clear. In section 2, "proxy priority this field indicates the willingness fo the sender to act as join proxy. Lower value indicates greater willingness" Typo "fo" IMO, it would be clearer if the field name in the protocol header matches the description for it. For example, "Proxy priority (proxy prio)" In Section 4, "An interloper with a radio sniffer would be able to use the network ID to map out the extend of the mesh network." extend or extent? _______________________________________________ 6tisch mailing list email@example.com https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/6tisch