What are the five most feared questions 1. *What are you thinking about? * 2. *Do you love me? * 3. *Do I look fat? * 4. *Do you think she is prettier than me? * 5. *What would you do if I died?*
* * What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analysed below along with possible responses. *Question 1: What are you thinking about?* The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I have been a bit pensive darling. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful,thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you." This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following: a. Nothing b. Football c. Jennifer Lopez d. How fat you are e. How would I spend the insurance money if you died Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg: "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you." *Question 2: Do you love me?* The proper response is: "YES" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is necessary: "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include: a. Oh yeah, sh*t loads b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes? c. That depends on what you mean by love d. Does it matter e. Who, me? *Question 3: Do I look fat?* The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!!" Among the incorrect answers are: a. Compared to what? b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin. c. A little extra weight looks good on you. d. I've seen fatter. e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died. *Question 4: Do you think she is prettier than me?* Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!!" Incorrect responses include: a. Yes, but you have a better personality b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age d. Define "pretty" e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died. *Question 5: What would you do if I died?* A definite no-win question. (The real answer of course is "Buy a Ferrari and a boat".) No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along these lines: WOMAN: Would you get married again? MAN: Definitely not! WOMAN: Why not? Don't you like being married? MAN: Of course I do. WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry? MAN: Okay, I'd get married again. WOMAN: You would? (with a hurt look on her face) MAN: (makes audible groan) WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed? MAN: Where else would we sleep? WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures and replace them with pictures of her? MAN: That would seem the proper thing to do. WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs? MAN: She can't. She's left-handed. WOMAN: ...silence... MAN: Sh*t __._,_.___ -- *".... I am the KING to my own UNIVERSE that Rule my MIND, BODY and SOUL !!! ...." * ** *- Aga Madjid -* -- you have this email because you join to "aga-madjid" GoogleGroups. to post emails, just send to : [email protected] to join this group, send blank email to : [email protected] to quit from this group, just send email to : [email protected] please visit to www.facebook.com/aga.madjid, add my Yahoo Messenger at [email protected] or add my twitter @aga_madjid thanks for joinning this group.
