English is a Crazy Language
there is no EGG in EGGPLANT
nor HAm in HAMBURGER;
neither APPLE nor PINE in PINEAPPLE.
.
ENGLISH MUFFINS weren't invented in ENGLAND.
.
QUICKSAND can work SLOWLY
Boxing RING are SQUARE
and a GUINEAPIG is neither from GUINEA nor is it a PIG.
.
And why is it that WRITERS WRITE but FINGERS don't FING;
GROCERS don't GROCE and HAMMERS don't HAM?
.
Doesn't it seems crazy that you can make AMENDS but not one AMEND?
.
if TEACHER TAUGHT, why didn't PREACHERS PRAUGHT?
If VEGETARIAN eats VEGETALBES, what does a HUMANITARIAN eat?
.
in what other language do people RECITE at a PLAY and PLAY at a RECITAL?
we SHIP BY TRUCK but send CARGO BY SHIP.
.
we have NOSES that RUN and FEET that SMELL.
we PARK in a DRIVEWAY and DRIVE in a PARKWAY.
.
and how can a SLIM CHANCE and a FAT CHANCE be the same,
while a WISE Man and a WISE GUY are opposites?
.
you have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which you HOUSE can BURN UP as it BURNS DOWN,
in which you FILL IN a form by FILLING IT OUT,
and in which an ALARM goes OFF by going ON.
.
and in closing, if FATHER is POP,
how come MOTHER's not MOP?
(^_^)

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