Hi all, I had visited a place called Vangni near Mumbai recently, where I met so many visually impaired couples of whom a woman is efficiently managing the entire household activity round the clock without any assistance or maid. Their everyday stories are untold just because they cannot well articulate them or maybe they are not that much educated to write it. But, surely hats off to those people!. And I think managing their houses in so much of adverse conditions is more of a challenge than anything else. Regards,
Surajsingh Jogi, Complaints management Dept., Kapas Bhawan, GITC Belapur, Navi Mumbai 400614. L/l 39367213 Mob. 9930137525 -----Original Message----- From: Ai [mailto:ai-boun...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in] On Behalf Of Nippur Jain (????? ???) via Ai Sent: Monday, July 10, 2017 1:45 PM To: Share, empower &Enrich Cc: Nippur Jain (नूपुर जैन) Subject: Re: [Ai] Maids Matter -An article on challenges of a visually impaired parent. House hold work is a team work also in many of the houses. Employing maids may not afodable for every family. -----Original Message----- From: Ai [mailto:ai-boun...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in] On Behalf Of Kanchan Pamnani via Ai Sent: Monday, July 10, 2017 1:39 PM To: 'Share, empower &Enrich' Cc: Kanchan Pamnani Subject: Re: [Ai] Maids Matter -An article on challenges of a visually impaired parent. Working VIMoms manage the same way as non VI but working moms Rajesh. If you want a full discussion on this then chat with my mom who was working when I was growing up and we didn’t have 3 servants. Payal has captured the problem well. K -----Original Message----- From: Ai [mailto:ai-boun...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in] On Behalf Of Asudani, Rajesh via Ai Sent: 10 July 2017 11:40 To: Share, empower &Enrich Cc: Asudani, Rajesh Subject: Re: [Ai] Maids Matter -An article on challenges of a visually impaired parent. Do people employ maids in UK and other European countries? If not, how do VI working manage? -----Original Message----- From: Ai [mailto:ai-boun...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in] On Behalf Of Geetha Shamanna via Ai Sent: Monday, July 10, 2017 12:50 AM To: 'Share, empower &Enrich' Cc: Geetha Shamanna Subject: Re: [Ai] Maids Matter -An article on challenges of a visually impaired parent. Hi Payal, This is commendable indeed. Juggling with maids is not easy at the best of times, and managing three of them is quite a task if one is visually impaired. Geetha -----Original Message----- From: Ai [mailto:ai-boun...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in] On Behalf Of payal jethra via Ai Sent: 02 July 2017 16:07 To: ai@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in Cc: payal jethra Subject: [Ai] Maids Matter -An article on challenges of a visually impaired parent. Hi All, Sharing an article on parenting & the challenges faced by a visually impaired parent… Happy Reading! Maids Matter - By Payal Jethra BLOGGER “It is time to celebrate with a Chocó cone!” Both Mother and son sit at the dining table around 10 in the night and thank God for the end of May and the beginning of June as they count their blessings reminiscing about how the past month has gone by peacefully with a few hiccups. The breeze is pleasant ,with a touch of pre monsoon showers bringing in fresh reasons to celebrate the beginning of yet another academic year. A month ago was not so far away when all three of Payal’s maids informed her one by one that they would be taking off to their respective villages. “You guys will be allowed to take leave only when you find yourselves a substitute!” teased Payal. Payal has been living all by herself with her nine year old son since the past four and a half years after her divorce. Her marriage had been one of constant bickering and when she could bear the emotional harassment no more she opted to live a life of peace having accepted total custody of her son Nihaar. She knew that she had to build up a support system to be able to focus on her home management, her job and her child’s academic goals. She chose to have three different maids – Manisha for cleaning the house, Sarita for managing meals and Satyavati Maushi, an elderly but calm and patient woman for babysitting her son during the time Payal is at office. The maids have been with her since the time she began living by herself with her son. Since the beginning she has been clear about treating the maids well but keeping money matters separate. The women respect her for her clarity in thought and instructions. All three maids come and go at regular timings and are clear about pampering Nihaar but not crossing the line when it comes to discipline. Manisha was the first to inform Payal that she would visit her village for the month of May. “My sister Kavita will work for the time that I am away,” she said. “Sure,” remarked Payal, “that’s fine. But I will want her to work only when one of us is at home, else I want her to come to work after I am back from office.” Manisha agreed and brought her sister along for a few days before she was to go on leave so Kavita could get to know about where to find the broom, detergent powder and other cleaning stuff. This was the beginning of a month of changes. Mother and son got use to Kavita. She was a quick and chattery woman, a little less tidy than manisha but very loving and sincere. Occasionally, she would agree to come around 7 in the evenings to work to suit Payal’s convenience. Payal appreciated that and compromised on letting her wash clothes the next morning. Nihaar and Kavita would have a look at Nihaar’s tulsi plant each morning and watch it grow as they watered it together. Sareeta, Payal’s cook takes off to her village twice a year – for 10 days during summer vacations, when her children are on school vacation and August September during Ganesh Chaturti. This summer she informed she would go from 13th to 23rd May. She had found Harshada, another cook who visits the neighborhood and convinced her to work in her place for a while. The two had discussed timings and salary. The only challenge for Payal was to manage lunch for Harshada, unlike Sareeta would be able to work only during evenings. Up until this point things seemed manageable for Payal, but when the baby sitter Satyavati Maushi mentioned she had to visit her native village for a family wedding, Payal had to take some time to sit down and think through 15 days of no baby sitter. She stayed calm for a while and let the news sink in. Then she decided to take it one day at a time. Satyavati Maushi will be on leave from 9th through 22nd May. A few days still seem manageable because Sareeta will be available to handle all meals until the 12th. Being visually challenged, preparing meals, keeping Nihaar’s bowl of mid morning fruits, a cup of milk and evening snack ready were challenging and time-consuming kitchen tasks which Payal dreaded. Payal works with a reputed public sector bank in Mumbai. She intended to use her leaves very cautiously. She had taken two weeks off during Nihaar’s annual examinations earlier during the year and could not at this point take leave knowing that there may be rainy days or trying times ahead which would require her presence at home on a more urgent basis. The first day she took Nihaar along to office, the second day was luckily a bank holiday. For the next two days, her friend agreed to come over and stay until Friday evening when Payal returns from work. Now, Payal had to think of the week of 15th through 21st May; those were six working days for Payal. The two days that Payal’s friend Gratia baby sat Nihaar, the duo had fun covering and labeling school books for the next year and listening to Radio Mirchi. For the morning of 12th May, Payal looked up movies and set up Gratia and Nihaar for a 9 a.m. Bahubali show. Payal had been speaking with relatives, cousins, friends and acquaintances trying to co-ordinate where she could drop off Nihaar for a few days. On the morning of 13th May, she woke up with tears in her eyes. This was getting tough, but she had to keep moving or solutions would not work. She set out with Nihaar and his bag pack to drop him off to her cousin’s at Thane for the next 4 to 5 days. She spent the entire day with cousins and headed home alone that night. Nihaar had agreed to go not because there were cousins of his age, but because Payal assured him they could speak on phone any time during the day whenever he wished. She took the few days to get the house in order during the time that Nihaar was at Thane. Her chachi and cousin had positive things to say about Nihaar’s stay at their place; that he had been eating well, keeping his clothes in order and sleeping at good timings. This made Payal feel very content that her efforts with Nihaar are showing desirable results. Payal had both substitute maids visiting during the evenings since Nihaar was away. On Wednesday, 17th May, the decision was made to bring Nihaar home. Chachi and cousins and family were to go outstation and Payal knew she had to take responsibility at this point. She took the day off from work and had a delightful lunch with her cousin once again thanking Chachi and family for being a part of the blessings in their lives. That evening at home, Nihaar sat at the kitchen counter assisting the substitute Harshada cook about where masalas and all ingredients are kept. Payal had come to depend on Sarreeta so much that she herself had to put in effort to recall where pulses are kept and what was in stock. Now, she was in a way relieved for Nihaar enjoyed handling that bit. They had a delightful dinner together as Payal left thoughts of how to get through the next 5 days, to God and cuddled into bed with Nihaar. “Mom!” cried Nihaar in delight, “wait till the Maushis return to see how well our Tulsi plant has grown, especially Manisha Maushi, she will be returning after a month!” jumped Nihaar out of bed the next morning. Payal was chatting on phone with her sister about happenings when Kanchan mentioned that she would be travelling but that it might be a good idea for Nihaar to spend a few days with his cousin sister and cousin brother at her place nevertheless. Payal thanked her and co-ordinated timings with her brother-in-law so Nihaar could be picked up from Payal’s place at a mutually convenient time and dropped off on Saturday evening. There the three of them enjoyed board games and playing UNO cards. Nihaar returned home once again to give his Mom a big hug. Payal and Nihaar had gotten through the most challenging two weeks with the cook and baby sitter away during the same time. Payal had been clear about taking leave only when necessary and she had gotten through these two weeks with only one leave which was an achievement for her. She was also determined that she would handle the situation only if it worked “win-win”, no pushing or inconveniencing people to make convenient accommodation for Nihaar. And today was their day! Satyavati maushi and Sareeta were back. Kavita was still working in place of Manisha and it was only a matter of days when Manisha too would be back to “see how tall the Tulsi had grown this summer!” https://www.mycity4kids.com/parenting/memoirs-of-a-single-parent/article/maids-matter Cheers! Payal Jethra Phone: 7303448295 Disclaimer: 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; 2. 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