HEADMASTER: Now look here, Dunlop, sonny Jim my lad. Mr Lawton
tells me that you have a problem with involuntary defecation during
his Religious Instruction class. Is this true?
DUNLOP: Yes, sir. It's not my fault though, it was yon Calum
Stirling - he gave me one of his dodgy second-hand sweeties!
HEADMASTER: That may be so. Nevertheless, such a serious problem
requires treatment, don't you think?
DUNLOP: Yes sir, I suppose so.
HEADMASTER: Right. Take this cork and report to the School Nurse
immediately! Ask her for a dose of Milk of Magnesia. You are excused.
DUNLOP: Crikey! I'm in for it now!
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