I fell for this hook line and sinker. It's very believable if you just take a quick scan. It was a solid minute and a half before I thought "wait a second... Minecraft *is* Java", went back and then said "wait... Minecraft GUI?!?"
If you just read the first sentence of each paragraph... David, thanks for the heart attack. On Mon, Apr 1, 2013 at 12:01 AM, Easter, David <[email protected]> wrote: > ** > > I’m sure many of you have seen the news articles on BMC going private – > e.g. Exclusive: Buyout firms team up to take BMC Software private - > sources<http://finance.yahoo.com/news/exclusive-buyout-firms-team-bmc-152725678.html>. > I just wanted to assure everyone that this will be nothing but a positive > for the future of AR System. By removing the need to answer to shareholder > value, BMC can be less conservative about innovation choices – which could > lead to substantial leaps forward in user experience and customer return on > investment. By melding the two well established idioms of “thinking > outside the box” and providing “out-of-the-box” functionality, we’ll be > able to create instant value for our customers the first time they interact > with our products.**** > > ** ** > > Before even a new line of code is written, BMC Customer Support will be > implementing new policies to improve BMC’s Customer Satisfaction Index > (CSI). Inspired by the acronym, BMC has created crack teams of IT forensic > investigators in several major cities that can be called out to the scene > of a violent IT event – crashes, network issues causing link death, > abnormal parent or child process termination, etc. These teams will work > on an issue until it’s resolved or until a new case comes up in the next > week – whichever comes first.**** > > ** ** > > Another area of focus will be heavier participation in social media. > While BMC is active on Twitter and Facebook, we’ll be expanding into Vine. > Customers will be able to submit a description of their incident to > Customer Service as long as the issue can be described in six seconds or > less. The response will also honor the six second limit of Vine, although > content is further limited because it takes about five seconds to say “Hi, > this is Jeff from BMC Support. Our goal at BMC is to provide you with an > excellent customer service experience.” Related to this, there’s an > Instagram interface under development that will enable customers to take a > picture of the error message on their screen but make it appear to be from > an Apple ][ plus circa 1979. **** > > ** ** > > We’ve decided that moving AR System to Java was the wrong way to go – so > we’ll be switching over to utilizing more off-the-shelf technologies like > IFTTT <https://ifttt.com/> to drive workflow and using a modern GUI > provided by the same engine that drives Minecraft <https://minecraft.net/>. > By using these ready-made technologies, we’ll be able to realize a huge > competitive advantage as our developers work on features unique to BMC. > While I can’t really talk about far futures much, I can say that we’re > partnering with other technology leaders in the industry to get ahead of > the curve. A strong partnership with Google is being investigated to > create a “driverless help desk”. We’ll be building on the BMC Virtual > Agent technology and Google’s driverless car AI to work customer submitted > help desk tickets to completion while the Technical Support Engineer sits > back and reads the paper, drinks a latte, etc. **** > > ** ** > > I look forward to sharing this future with all of you. Amazing > possibilities resulting in leadership & freedom of opportunity look > sensational!**** > > ** ** > > -David J. Easter**** > > Manager of Product Management, AR System**** > > BSM & Atrium Solutions Management**** > > BMC Software, Inc.**** > > **** > > The opinions, statements, and/or suggested courses of action expressed in > this E-mail do not necessarily reflect reality or those of BMC Software, > Inc. My voluntary attempt at humor in this forum is not intended to convey > a role as a spokesperson, liaison or public relations representative for > BMC Software, Inc.**** > > ** ** > _ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are" and have been for 20 years_ _______________________________________________________________________________ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org "Where the Answers Are, and have been for 20 years"
