Hi Momy:
Thanks for your response. I am delighted to see a young Oxomiya
woman holding her ground and providing leadership and courage to
others like Jyoti Das and Nayan Medhi for example in a forum
such as assamnet. That is MY kind of an Oxomiya; courageous, proud and
willing to take a stand for what she believes in :-). So all powers to
you Momy.
Having said that, I think it is important to point out out what
was wrong about the OPINIONS that you delivered in your farewell
note/s:
*** First off, your disappointments about assamnetters and
assamnet were indeed rooted on an unexpressed assumption that it is a
forum which ought to discuss
only projects and issues such as what you hold dear, to
the exclusion of issues that others might find more interesting. No
doubt yours and others' like yourself who expressed such sentiments
are GOOD and laudable issues/projects.
But it does not mean, in any way shape or form, that other issues
could not or should not be pursued at the same time.
*** It is not a secret that yours, Jyoti's, Nayan's , Rajib's and
a lot many others' angst in assamnet is rooted in your disagreements
with the political viewpoints of those such as yours truly. You, just
like anybody else here, are entitled to your views. But it would have
been better if you could express that forthrightly, instead of finding
other reasons to vent your frustrations. That is what I alluded to as
the "Urohi gosor wr onyo korbaat", which roughly translated
means that the real root of the disappointments are different from
what was presented as.
*** Your assumptions about the 'older generation' of expatriate
Oxomiyas as a self-centered lot, unwilling to help others is a rather
shallow and ignorant one. It is a typically unenviable
Indian/Kharkhowa trait of making broad brush
judgements about a whole class of people based on scanty
sampling.
*** What *I* do or have done, either as charity or as public
service, is MY business. I don't need anybody's approval or judgement
about its adequacy. Besides, it is neither about ME, nor you, nor Rini
Kakati, whom you have singled out as a villain :-). That is why I
shall not speak about it here.
*** It is also true that as laudable as charitable efforts are,
they are merely
outlets for salving one's guilt, and are inadequate vehicles for
improving Assam's lot.
Personally I have no need to resort to charitable efforts to
soothe my feelings of guilt. The burden of my guilt is far less than
most I know. But I have nothing against those who do.
*** I do have a right to use the words I do to characterize
opinions of others, including 'naive', just as you do. But I use words
judiciously and carefully, and only when I can back them up.
If you would like to know why I used the word naive, let me know,
I will be pleased to explain :-).
>NOT TRYING TO PROVE ANYTHING.
*** Not true. The haughtiness with which you dismissed assamnet,
and thus its many participants, was a poor display of your own
self-importance and self-image. While you are entitled to it, others
don't need to accept it without a word :-).
>I won't go into details now(YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME IF YOU
WANT TO), but if you >would like for me to, I will be pleased to
take them up for discussion at a >later time.(WHY PRIVATE..IT
STARTED IN A PUBLIC FORUM, KEEP IT THAT WAY)>
*** I don't get into private debates about public issues.
>(TALK AND TALK AND TALK SO THAT BY THE TIME I AM OF YOUR AGE,
I WILL SHARE MY >OPINION WITH A YOUNGER MEMBER IN THE EXACT SAME
WAY AS YOU HAVE DONE).
*** Discussions/debates and action are not mutually exclusive of
each other. Both can happen at the same time. Assamnet is NOT an
action group, never has been, never will be. So if you came here with
the expectation that it will be a platform for launching ACTIONS,
while entirely possible ( I have personally led such efforts in the
past and more than once), is not at all a given and not a realistic
expectation. That *I* have learnt from my nearly 12 years in
assamnet. But the difference between you and I is that I did NOT leave
in a huff, because I could not interest others in what I consider
worthwhile or important. When I failed, it was due to my inability
to communicate and persuade. And when we succeeded ( yes we did
too) it was because others did participate and contribute.
That is what I and Ram too attempted to point out to you, but
unsuccessfully. No doubt because you already knew everything you
needed to :-) about assamnet.
>WELL THAN POINT ME TOWARDS THE RIGHT DIRECTION, DONT ASK ME
TO ARGUE, DEBATE >AND DISCUSS)
*** It is not my place to teach someone like you Momy.I was
merely attempting to point out what was missing from your assessments
and verdicts. I do however serve as a teacher to those who learn from
what I point out, just as all those others from whom *I* have
learnt so much over a decade and more.
In fact I can, without any hesitation what-so-ever, declare
that I have learnt MORE about Assam (and India too) from this
forum than anywhere else in my entire life, in-spite of the fact that
I grew up in what is essentially Assam's heartland. And I know I
am the better for it.
Assamnet is, without a doubt, the most important forum for
Assam and the Oxomiya identity that has developed in this IT age. And
the credit for it goes to Prof. Jugal Kalita,Prof. Deep Medhi and the
people who contribute to its existence and expansion thru their
participation.
>AND AM NOT AT THE LEAST INTERESTED IN ALL YOUR OPINIONS
ABOUT ME ( ESP. MR >MAHANTA)..
*** But the opinions that *I* have expressed are a
RESULT of the opinions that you expressed and implied Momy. I do
not go about finding ways to express opinions of others in this net or
anywhere else. But I do speak out when I find reasons to take issue
with others'.
Another long one here. Nice to have spoken to you. Wish you the
best on all your efforts, personal as well as societal.
cm
At 4:19 PM +0100 10/12/06, Momy Saikia wrote:
Hi Momy (HELLO MR MAHANTA):
I was disappointed to read your note on the disappointments of your
own (YOU SHOULD BE AND EVERYONE ELSE BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T APPRAISE AN YOUTH'S OPINION).
Allow me to share a little observation of mine, with the hope that
you will take a moment of your precious time to ponder(I ALWAYS HAVE TIME FOR ANY CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM AS ITS ONE OF THE REASONS BEHIND MY DEVELOPMENT):
Expectations is the mother of all disappointments!" (WELL IF YOU ASK ME...EXPECTATION IS THE MOTHER OF ACHIEVEMENT)..... Is it catchy or
what? (ITS DEGRADING THE TERM FOR ME SO NOT CATCHY AT ALL SIR) Remember you heard it here first :-)( I NEVER HEARD OF IT AND EVEN IF I DID, I WOULDN'T MAKE SENSE OF IT BECAUSE THESE PROVERBS ARE OUTCOME OF SOMEONE'S EXPERIENCE NOT MINE).
The point is that you had expectations of assamnetters (NEVER DID, THATS YOUR PRESSUMPTION); does not matter if they are realistic, meaningful, useful, or otherwise(ANY INTELLIGENT BEING WOULD AGREE THAT TAKING AN ACTION TO HELP SOMEONE ISN'T UNREALISTIC, NON MEANINGFULL OR USELESS). And since those were not met (TRUE), you are leaving the forum (LEAVING THE FORUM BECAUSE, I WOULD RATHER INVEST TIME IN ACTIONS THAN DISCUSSIONS WHICH LEADS ME NOWHERE BUT RESULTS IN RESENTMENT TOWARDS DIFFERENT PEOPLE OR GOVT IN THE END), in a huff (WELLCOME TO THE 21st CENTURY, IF YOU NEED SOMETHING DONE THAN DO IT NOW),
waving your own virtues(CAUSE I BELIEVE IN THEM UNLIKE MOST OF YOU), imagined or real(ABSOLUTELY REAL AND SO I AM ABLE TO PUT THEM INTO ACTIONS),
for others to see and go (ACTUALLY TO IRK MINDS LIKE YOU...THE POSITIVE OUTCOME OF MY MAIL IS THAT SOME PEOPLE HAVE MAILED ME IN PERSON OFFERING HELP TO BUILD A SITE...BUT YOU AGAIN TOOK TIME TO WRITE ME A PAGE FULL OF YOUR OPINION ABOUT ME AND WANTING A DEBATE OUT OF IT) ( --Wow! What a young lady of action she is (SURE I AM, ELSE I WOULDN'T HAVE THE CONFIDENCE TO POINT AT THE "WORDS ONLY" GROUP).
But I understand ( I SERIOUSLY HOPE YOU DO). Most do(AGAIN I CAN HOPE THAT THEY DO). We have seen them all here (THIS COULD ONLY MEAN TO ME THAT YOU HAVE BEEN POSTING YOUR OPINIONS ON THIS SITE SINCE IT FIRST STARTED). Good news (NOT REALLY CAUSE YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME)
however is that you are young (JUST 25, LOT OF EXPECTATIONS YET), and hopefully still open to learning (I WOULDN'T BE DEVELOPING IF I WASNT OPEN TO LEARNING)new tricks unlike some old us old dogs (DONOT EVER HUMILIATE YOURSELF...NO ONE CALLS YOU THAT , I AM SURE) . And it is NOT a beauty contest (I DO UNDERSTAND SIR, SEEKING HELP FROM YOU GUYS TO HELP OTHERS ISN'T A THOUGHT OF A BEAUTY ONLY...BEAUTY+BRAINS) here -- to prove what a hot-s--t one is or not (NOT TRYING TO PROVE ANYTHING..DO READ MY MAIL ONCE MORE) :-).New tricks? (TRICKS???THOUGHT I WAS STRAIGHT FORWARD) Indeed. You have shown how naive(WITH ALL DUE RESPECT SIR, INSPITE OF YOUR AGE YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO USE "SUCH" WORDS AGAINST ME) you are about some of your assumptions (ASSUMPTIONS GET YOU STARTED WITH ANY PROBLEM), beliefs ( CAUSE I BELEIVE IN THEM) and expectations(TO BE ABLE TO ACHIEVE, I NEED TO EXPECT), from the few notes you posted here(FEW BUT SUBSTANTIAL). I won't go into details now(YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME IF YOU WANT TO), but if you would like for me to, I will be pleased to take them up for discussion at a later time.(WHY PRIVATE..IT STARTED IN A PUBLIC FORUM, KEEP IT THAT WAY)>But that is nothing new (YOUR OPINION AGAIN SIR). You are not alone in your naivete (I WOULD BE GLAD IF YOU ARE NOT ONE OF MY KIND THAN). We have all been there(HAVE YOU??NOT REALLY OR ELSE YOU WON'T BE STILL A MEMBER OF THE FORUM). Again good news is that we can shed them(NO INTENSIONS OF SHEDDING MY QUALITIES). How? Yes, by talking(TALK AND TALK AND TALK SO THAT BY THE TIME I AM OF YOUR AGE, I WILL SHARE MY OPINION WITH A YOUNGER MEMBER IN THE EXACT SAME WAY AS YOU HAVE DONE). By
debating, discussing and deliberating and by paying attention(I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR PROLONGED DISCUSSIONS OR DEBATES).
You may ask: But isn't that a waste of time? Aren't you guys just blowing air, accomplishing NOTHING? (THERE YOU GO..SEE YOU FINALLY KNOW ME BETTER)
Well, it would be, IF that is ALL we do (YOU WOULD KNOW BETTER).
See Momy, discussing and debating the issues we do, is NOT mutually exclusive of doing something concrete(WHICH I QUITE WELL UNDERSTOOD EVEN BEFORE YOU MENTIONED).
That is what you fail to recognize(MAYBE, THANK U FOR TAKING THE EFFORT TO MAKE ME REALISE). Again, no harm done. You have a lot of time to learn(I AGREE WITH YOU THERE).
Many netters do many things--for their own betterment and for others' too. Not all talk of their actions or contributions. And besides, there is ALWAYS a whole lot more to the persona of these people than what their posts in assamnet may indicate. It will do you good to be aware of that(PLEASE MAKE ME AWARE OF WHAT YOU HAVE DONE SO FAR AS YOU CLAIM TO BE OLD ..YOU HAVE HAD YOUR WHOLE LIFE AHEAD).
What is important to recognize however, is that those who know better, or are expected to know better--people like yourselves, cannot and must not remain smug in your own righteousness, your self-image of a person of action, like you assert(WELL THAN POINT ME TOWARDS THE RIGHT DIRECTION, DONT ASK ME TO ARGUE, DEBATE AND DISCUSS). For if you do, you will be NO DIFFERENT from those who you perceive, albeit on scant and superficial evidence of assamnet posts, to be mere hot-air blowers, or having little to contribute towards what YOU consider meaningful. What is meaningful can come in many, many forms(JUST AN EXAMPLE FROM YOU IS WHAT I AM REQUESTING FOR..BESIDES I CLEARLY MENTIONED TWO CATEGORIES IN MY CONCLUDING LINE..PLEASE READ IT).
Another thing is that, we know, often a new member would leave in a huff, because netters' criticisms/comments hurt their sense of what they hold dear(I BELEIVE IN MYSELF AND SOME INDIVIDUAL WHO IS VIRTUALLY KNOW TO ME JUST CANT HURT ME WITH WORDS..IT WILL TAKE YOU LOT MORE): Often myths associated with their realities or their beliefs (AGAIN FIRM BELEIEFS). And being unable or unwilling to articulate a defense of their own values and views, they would cite others' 'egos' or pro-this or anti-that or full-of-hot-air-ness(NOT ME...BUT YOUR MAIL COULD BE A CLASSIC EXAMPLE). This is the quintessential "Urohi-gosor-wrtw-onyo-korbat" syndrome(TAR MANE NUBUJILU). There is only one cure for it: SPEAK UP, defend what you believe(I ALWAYS DO CAUSE I HAVE NO FEAR OR SECOND THOUGHTS..I AM CONFIDENT AND ALWAYS SPEAK OF THINGS I CAN DEFEND IF NECESSARY). You will be surprised, that you CAN educate others(I KNOW THAT). And we will all be the better for it.
Gave you an earful, didn't I :-)?(I CAN ABSORB MORE BUT DONT'T MAKE IT A HABBIT)
Take care(U TOO), and whether you return to assamnet or not,(I WON'T AFTER TODAY) all the best to you and yours(AND TO YOU SIR).
cm(MOMY)
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