Hi,
Yesterday I was going over a Reading Comprehension passage with a teenaged
girl student - written by a Japanese American author. The girl didn't like the
passage at all - perhaps becos it seemed so alien to her as well - though she
grew up near there for most of her life. She doesn't seem to believe in
arranged marriage either, since I have greeted her many times near my work
place - once when was roaming arm-in-arm with her boyfriend and had then
seemed shocked to see me.Surprisingly I took it very smoothly - unlike if it
had been one of my Indian students.
The Japanese passage started with a young boy and a young girl falling in
love and then the boy telling his mother about it. His mother promises to take
up the matter with the girl's mother. A meeting is arranged. One evening the
boy's mother goes to the girl's house and is well received with a proper tea
ceremony alongwith banana slices well laid out . They discuss the weather and
usual pleasantaries and then they exchange goodbyes. After returning home the
boy's mother tells her son that the girl's family rejected the offer.
Ofcourse, they rejected the offer -as anyone familiar with Japanese
conventions would tell you (in the passage) that fruits do not go well with
tea ceremony.
Last year I had written the following to a Harvard classmate of mine (by
mistake I had posted it on AssamNet
http://assamnet.org/pipermail/assam_assamnet.org/2006-March/005463.html )
while she was volunteering near Indonesia.That was mostly explaining culture
gaps across continents -esp relating to marriage. Ofcourse, after Alpana-ji
cautioned me during my Harvard sujourn about what is defined as harrassement in
US - and having made a few small mistakes since -and having received solid
advice from ABCD & white American roommates (who witnessed my mistakes) who
told me never to try such things at the place of your stay or work.
Later, they qualified it by saying that you make ask if someone wants to
accompany you for "a cup of coffee." As yet noone has gone for that cup of
coffee with me.
Ofcourse, in India we copy by the Hollywood standards - not by US legal
standards
http://www.123oye.com/job-articles/office/office-romance.htm Indian view
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4182/is_19981130/ai_n10123865 US view
--
in my previous job dating with colleagues was banned - told to us in our
first meeting.
any comments ?
Umesh
Umesh Sharma
Washington D.C.
1-202-215-4328 [Cell]
Ed.M. - International Education Policy
Harvard Graduate School of Education,
Harvard University,
Class of 2005
http://www.uknow.gse.harvard.edu/index.html (Edu info)
http://hbswk.hbs.edu/ (Management Info)
www.gse.harvard.edu/iep (where the above 2 are used )
http://jaipurschool.bihu.in/
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