Re: Our most amusing idiotic stories where we screw something up horribl
No phone in microwave. Check.
Wow.
I feel that many of these things are...really not all that bad. Embarrassing, sure, but in the grand scheme, maybe not awful. This includes my own example of the sink overflowing, even.
But I've got another one.
When I turned nine, I was told that I could have a birthday party, and one friend of my choosing could stay the night. I was able to invite a whole pile of friends, which was awesome. I'm going to change the names of the friends that are central to this story just for safety's sake, let's call them Bill and Bob. I really wanted Bob to stay overnight, but I tried calling him first and he wasn't home. So I called everyone else, invited them to the party, and then at the end of the list I called Bill. Now I liked Bill well enough, but had no desire to have him sleep over. I was so set on calling Bob again afterword that before I realized what I was doing, I had asked Bill if he wanted to sleep over. My mom heard me doing it and patted my shoulder. Bill came back to the phone, sounding a little surprised, said his parents were okay with it.
Needless to say, I wasn't allowed to fix it. They said it wouldn't be kind or fair, and while I was pissed at myself for the mistake, even at nine I agreed that it would be a pretty shitty thing to do. So I did call Bob, and Bob came over as well, but at the end of the night, he went and Bill stayed. Bill actually got along better with my brother than me, and I probably without realizing it was less than gracious as far as being a host goes, so Bill and my brother spent most of the time before Bill went home the next day playing, and I felt miserable.
Again, not an awful, dangerous experience, but definitely embarrassing.
Speaking of really, really embarrassing though? Some of you non-native English speakers may not get this one.
Well, around the same age (maybe ten, not nine, I'm not entirely sure), I was yet again having a birthday party. When I was asked to make a wish, and someone asked me what I'd wished for, I said something like, "My wish was to be well-endowed". The adults present just about killed themselves laughing, and I had no idea what was so funny.
You see, I'd heard the term, and from context I thought it meant wealthy. So here I was, wishing for wealth, when in fact, in colloquial terms, to be well-endowed means that you have larger genitalia. When they decide to roast me (as they do from time to time, and as happens to others in my family as well, of course) this story is always trotted out at some point.
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