Authors,

While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as necessary) the 
following questions, which are also in the XML file.


1) <!-- [rfced] Please insert any keywords (beyond those that appear in
the title) for use on https://www.rfc-editor.org/search. -->


2) <!-- [rfced] Abstract

a) We updated the text starting with "which does not..." as follows to improve
readability; please review and let us know any concerns.

Original:
   This document specifies Protocol Independent Multicast Light (PIM
   Light) and PIM Light Interface (PLI) which does not need PIM Hello
   message to accept PIM Join/Prune messages.  PLI can signal multicast
   states over networks that can not support full PIM neighbor
   discovery, as an example BIER networks that are connecting two or
   more PIM domains.

Perhaps:
   This document specifies Protocol Independent Multicast Light (PIM Light)
   and the PIM Light Interface (PLI). A PLI does not need a PIM Hello
   message to accept PIM Join/Prune messages, and it can signal multicast
   states over networks that cannot support full PIM neighbor
   discovery, such as Bit Index Explicit Replication (BIER) networks that 
connect two or
   more PIM domains.

b) Should "protocol and procedures" be updated to just "procedures" as in the
Introduction?

Original:
   This document outlines the PIM
   Light protocol and procedures to ensure loop-free multicast traffic
   between two or more PIM Light routers.

Perhaps:
   This document outlines PIM
   Light procedures to ensure loop-free multicast traffic
   between two or more PIM Light routers.
-->


3) <!-- [rfced] This is a sentence fragment. How may we update to make a 
complete
sentence? Also, please confirm that "network" is intended here; elsewhere
in the document, we see "BIER domain" rather than "BIER network".

Original:
   For example, in a Bit Index Explicit
   Replication (BIER) [RFC8279] networks connecting multiple PIM
   domains, where PIM Join/Prune messages are tunneled via BIER as
   specified in [draft-ietf-bier-pim-signaling].

Perhaps:
   An example is a Bit Index Explicit
   Replication (BIER) [RFC8279] network connecting multiple PIM
   domains, where PIM Join/Prune messages are tunneled via BIER as
   specified in [BIER-PIM].

Or:
   For example, in a Bit Index Explicit
   Replication (BIER) [RFC8279] network connecting multiple PIM
   domains, PIM Join/Prune messages are tunneled via BIER as
   specified in [draft-ietf-bier-pim-signaling].
-->


4) <!-- [rfced] Please clarify the text starting with "to ensure...". Also, is
"reviver" correct? Or is "receiver" or something else intended?

Original:
   As an example
   the implementation should ensure that DR election is done on upstream
   Redundant PIM routers that are at the edge of the PIM Light Domain to
   ensure a single Designated Router to forward the PIM Join message
   from reviver to the Source.

Perhaps:
   As an example,
   the implementation should ensure that DR election is done on upstream
   redundant PIM routers that are at the edge of the PIM Light domain to
   ensure that a single DR forwards the PIM Join message
   from the receiver to the source.
-->


5) <!-- [rfced] FYI - We reordered the list in Section 3.1 by type number as 
only
one was out of order.
-->


6) <!-- [rfced] Is the text starting with "from the..." needed here? Other
entries in the list do not have such notes, and in the IANA registry
(linked to in the text introducing this list), RFC 7761 is listed as a
reference for type 3. See https://www.iana.org/assignments/pim-parameters/.

Original:
   1.  type 3 (Join/Prune) from the ALL-PIM-ROUTERS message types listed
       in [RFC7761].

Current:
   *  type 3 (Join/Prune) (Note that this type is from the ALL-PIM-
      ROUTERS message types listed in [RFC7761].)

Perhaps:
   *  type 3 (Join/Prune)
-->


7) <!-- [rfced] FYI - We updated "13" to "13.0" to match the registry at
https://www.iana.org/assignments/pim-parameters/.

Original:
   type 13 (PIM Packed Null-Register)

Updated:
   type 13.0 (PIM Packed Null-Register)
-->


8) <!-- [rfced] Is "unicast destination IP" correct here, or should it be 
"unicast
destination IP addresses" (with "addresses")?

Original:
   7.  Any future PIM message types that use unicast destination IP.

Perhaps:
   *  Any future PIM message types that use unicast destination IP addresses.
-->


9) <!-- [rfced] Will readers know what both instances of "it" refer to in the
text "it SHOULD NOT process a join message containing it"?

Original:
   As such, PIM Light is unaware of its neighbor's
   capability to process join attributes and it SHOULD NOT process a
   join message containing it.

Perhaps:
   As such, PIM Light is unaware of its neighbor's
   capability to process join attributes and SHOULD NOT process a
   Join message containing a join attribute.
-->


10) <!-- [rfced] We note that the sentence below in Section 3.2.2 uses "PIM
networks" but the figure uses "PIM domain". Are any updates needed?

Original:
   For instance, in a BIER domain connecting two PIM networks, a PLI can
   be used between BIER edge routers solely for multicast state
   communication and transmit only PIM Join/Prune messages.

Perhaps:
   For instance, in a BIER domain connecting two PIM domains, a PLI can
   be used between BIER edge routers solely for multicast state
   communication and transmit only PIM Join/Prune messages. 
-->


11) <!-- [rfced] Please clarify "An example DR election could be DR election".

Original:
   An example DR election could be DR election between router D and F in
   above figure.

Perhaps:
   For example, DR election could be between router D and F in
   above figure.
-->


12) <!-- [rfced] In Sections 3.2.2 and 3.4, we recommend including text to
introduce figure. 

In Section 3.2.2, perhaps the second paragraph can be moved before the figure
and first sentence of that paragraph updated in one of the following ways.

Original:
   For instance, in a BIER domain connecting two PIM networks, a PLI can
   be used between BIER edge routers solely for multicast state
   communication and transmit only PIM Join/Prune messages.

Perhaps (add "as in the figure below"):
   For instance, in a BIER domain connecting two PIM networks as
   in the figure below, a PLI can
   be used between BIER edge routers solely for multicast state
   communication and transmit only PIM Join/Prune messages.

Or (use two sentences):
   For instance, the figure below depicts a BIER domain connecting
   two PIM networks. A PLI can
   be used between BIER edge routers solely for multicast state
   communication and transmit only PIM Join/Prune messages.

In Section 3.4, perhaps the last paragraph can be moved before the figure and
updated as follows.

Original:
   In another example, where the PLI is configured automatically between
   the BIER Edge Routers (BER), when the downstream BIER Edge Router
   (DBER) is no longer reachable on the upstream BIER Edge Router
   (UBER), the UBER which is also a PIM Light Router can prune the <S,G>
   advertised toward the source on the PIM domain to stop the
   transmission of the multicast stream.

Perhaps:
   In another example, the PLI is configured automatically between
   the BIER Edge Routers (BERs) as in the figure below. When the downstream 
BIER Edge Router
   (DBER) is no longer reachable on the upstream BIER Edge Router
   (UBER), the UBER (which is also a PIM Light router) can prune the <S,G>
   advertised toward the source on the PIM domain to stop the
   transmission of the multicast stream.
-->


13) <!-- [rfced] May we move the text "to prevent multicast stream duplication" 
as
follows to improve readability?

Original:
   If there
   are redundant PIM routers at the edge of the BIER domain, to prevent
   multicast stream duplication, they MUST establish PIM adjacency as
   per [RFC7761] to ensure DR election at the edge of BIER domain.

Perhaps:
   If there
   are redundant PIM routers at the edge of the BIER domain, they MUST
   establish PIM adjacency as per [RFC7761] to prevent multicast stream
   duplication and to ensure DR election at the edge of the BIER domain.
-->


14) <!-- [rfced] We updated this sentence as follows; please review and let us
know any concerns.

Original:
   If a router
   supports PIM Light, only when PLI is enabled on an interface,
   arriving Join/Prune messages MUST be processed, otherwise they MUST
   be dropped.

Updated:
   If a router supports PIM Light, arriving Join/Prune messages MUST be
   processed only when a PLI is enabled on an interface; otherwise, they MUST
   be dropped.
-->


15) <!-- [rfced] This sentence does not parse. We updated as follows. Let us 
know
any concerns.

Original:
   While on some logical interfaces PLI maybe enabled
   automatically or via an underlying mechanism, as an example the
   logical interface connecting two or more BIER edge routers in a BIER
   subdomain [draft-ietf-bier-pim-signaling].

Updated:
   PLI may be enabled automatically or via an underlying mechanism on some
   logical interfaces (for example, the logical interface connecting two or
   more BIER edge routers in a BIER subdomain [BIER-PIM]).
-->


16) <!-- [rfced] We confirmed that port 8471 is correct in this sentence per the
registry at https://www.iana.org/assignments/service-names-port-numbers. In the
registry, we see that port 8471 is also for PORT with SCTP as the transport
protocol. This sentence just mentions TCP, though SCTP is mentioned in
the next sentence. Are any updates needed?

Original:
   For TCP, PIM over reliable transport (PORT) uses port 8471
   which is assigned by IANA.  
-->


17) <!-- [rfced] The first sentence below uses "MUST", but the second uses 
"must"
(although it says "the same is true"). Please review and let us know if
any updates are needed.

Original:
   [RFC6559] mentions that when a
   router is configured to use PIM over TCP on a given interface, it
   MUST include the PIM-over-TCP-Capable Hello Option in its Hello
   messages for that interface.  The same is true for SCTP and the
   router must include PIM-over-SCTP-Capable Hello Option in its Hello
   message on that interface.

Perhaps:
   [RFC6559] mentions that when a
   router is configured to use PIM over TCP on a given interface, it
   MUST include the PIM-over-TCP-Capable Hello Option in its Hello
   messages for that interface.  The same is true for SCTP; the
   router MUST include the PIM-over-SCTP-Capable Hello Option in its Hello
   message on that interface.
-->


18) <!-- [rfced] Will readers understand "Connection ID IP address comparison"?
What is being compared?

Original:
   When the router is using SCTP, the Connection ID IP address
   comparison need not be done since the SCTP can handle call
   collision.
-->


19) <!-- [rfced] This sentence in Section 3.5 explains that a Connection ID is 
an
IPv4 or IPv6 address used to establish the SCTP or TCP connection:

Original
   These Hello options contain a Connection ID which is an IPv4 or IPv6
   address used to establish the SCTP or TCP connection.

The sentence below appears in the next paragraph. Should the text starting
with "Connection ID IPv4 or IPv6 addresses..." be updated for consistency with
the previous text?

Original:
   PIM Light lacks Hello messages, the PLI can be configured with the
   Connection ID IPv4 or IPv6 addresses used to establish the SCTP or
   TCP connection.

Perhaps:
   Because PIM Light lacks Hello messages, the PLI can be configured with the
   Connection ID (i.e., the IPv4 or IPv6 address used to establish the SCTP or
   TCP connection).

Or:
   Because PIM Light lacks Hello messages, the PLI can be configured with the
   Connection ID.
-->


20) <!-- [rfced] Should "Source-Specific and Sparse Mode Join/Prune messages" 
here
be updated to "PIM-SSM and PIM-SM Join/Prune messages"?

Original:
   Furthermore, because PIM Light can be used for signaling Source-
   Specific and Sparse Mode Join/Prune messages, the security
   considerations outlined in [RFC7761] and [RFC4607] SHOULD be
   considered where appropriate.

Perhaps:
   Furthermore, because PIM Light can be used for signaling PIM-SSM
   and PIM-SM Join/Prune messages, the security
   considerations outlined in [RFC7761] and [RFC4607] SHOULD be
   considered where appropriate.
-->


21) <!-- [rfced] Terminology

a) These terms are used inconsistently throughout the text. Should these be
uniform? If so, please let us know which form is preferred.

DR Election vs. DR election
<S,G> vs. (S,G)


b) We also note inconsistencies in the terms listed below. We chose the form
on the right. Please let us know any objections.

PIM Light Router vs. PIM Light router
PIM Light Domain vs. PIM Light domain
connection ID vs Connection ID
Source vs. source
join message vs. Join message
join/prune message vs. Join/Prune message


c) Should "join attribute" be capitalized per usage in RFC 5384?


d) Article usage (e.g., "a" and "the") with "PIM Light Interface" and "PLI"
was mixed. We added articles in some instances. Please review for
correctness.

-->


22) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the online 
Style Guide <https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language>
and let us know if any changes are needed.  Updates of this nature typically
result in more precise language, which is helpful for readers.

Note that our script did not flag any words in particular, but this should 
still be reviewed as a best practice.
-->


Thank you.

RFC Editor/rv



On Feb 10, 2025, at 8:38 PM, rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org wrote:

*****IMPORTANT*****

Updated 2025/02/10

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--------------

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--------------------------------------
RFC9739 (draft-ietf-pim-light-11)

Title            : Protocol Independent Multicast Light (PIM Light)
Author(s)        : H. Bidgoli, S. Venaas, M. Mishra, Z. Zhang, M. McBride
WG Chair(s)      : Stig Venaas, Mike McBride

Area Director(s) : Jim Guichard, John Scudder, Gunter Van de Velde

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