Hi Lars,

Thank you very much for your review.
All your comments have been addressed in version 12.
Let us know if you have further questions.

Please see in-line with [Jorge].

Thanks!
Jorge


From: Lars Eggert via Datatracker <[email protected]>
Date: Friday, August 4, 2023 at 4:53 AM
To: The IESG <[email protected]>
Cc: [email protected] 
<[email protected]>, [email protected] 
<[email protected]>, [email protected] <[email protected]>, Stephane Litkowski 
<[email protected]>, [email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject: Lars Eggert's No Objection on draft-ietf-bess-evpn-pref-df-11: (with 
COMMENT)

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Lars Eggert has entered the following ballot position for
draft-ietf-bess-evpn-pref-df-11: No Objection

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----------------------------------------------------------------------
COMMENT:
----------------------------------------------------------------------

# GEN AD review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-pref-df-11

CC @larseggert

Thanks to Vijay Gurbani for the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) review
(https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/yyKue3u0e4F2LuAMSzjlxaEKHrQ).

## Comments

### Section 1.1, paragraph 2
```
     While the Default Designated Forwarder Algorithm [RFC7432] or the
     Highest Random Weight algorithm (HRW) [RFC8584] provide an efficient
     and automated way of selecting the Designated Forwarder across
     different Ethernet Tags in the Ethernet Segment, there are some use-
     cases where a more 'deterministic' and user-controlled method is
     required.  At the same time, Service Providers require an easy way to
```
Why is "deterministic" in quotes here? Is this algorithm not
(always) in fact deterministic? Could a more accurate term be
chosen?
[Jorge] I removed “deterministic”. I think “user-controlled method” conveys the 
meaning that we want in this text.


### Section 4.1, paragraph 1
```
     Assuming the operator wants to control - in a flexible way - what PE
     becomes the Designated Forwarder for a given virtual Ethernet Segment
     and the order in which the PEs become Designated Forwarder in case of
     multiple failures, the following procedure may be used:
```
It's not clear what kind of procedure the list items a-f describe. The
individual list items read more like standalone considerations than
any kind of procedure.
[Jorge] we changed the first paragraph, hopefully it reads better now. Let us 
know please.


## Nits

All comments below are about very minor potential issues that you may choose to
address in some way - or ignore - as you see fit. Some were flagged by
automated tools (via https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool), so there
will likely be some false positives. There is no need to let me know what you
did with these suggestions.
[Jorge] ok, thanks.


### Typos

#### Section 4.1, paragraph 2
```
-        (100,0,Highest-Preferance), (200,0,Highest-Preference) and
-                             ^
+        (100,0,Highest-Preference), (200,0,Highest-Preference) and
+                             ^
```

#### Section 4.1, paragraph 11
```
-           if PE2's IP addres is lower than PE1's.  Same example applies
+           if PE2's IP address is lower than PE1's.  Same example applies
+                            +
```

#### Section 4.2, paragraph 1
```
-    Segment.  A potential way to achive a more granular load balancing is
-    decribed below.
+    Segment.  A potential way to achieve a more granular load balancing is
+                                     +
+    described below.
+      +
```

### Outdated references

Document references `draft-ietf-bess-evpn-virtual-eth-segment-11`, but `-12` is
the latest available revision.
[Jorge] updated, thanks.

### Grammar/style

#### Section 4.1, paragraph 3
```
nce is more preferred than PE2's). Hence PE1 becomes the Designated Forwarde
                                   ^^^^^
```
A comma may be missing after the conjunctive/linking adverb "Hence".
[Jorge] added


#### Section 4.1, paragraph 4
```
dered list for vES1 is <PE2, PE1>. Hence PE2 becomes the Designated Forwarde
                                   ^^^^^
```
A comma may be missing after the conjunctive/linking adverb "Hence".
[Jorge] added



#### Section 4.1, paragraph 6
```
s are used as tie-breakers. If more that one PE is advertising itself as the
                                    ^^^^
```
Did you mean "than"?
[Jorge] fixed


#### Section 4.3, paragraph 11
```
with DP=1, that is, PE2 (Pref=200). Hence PE3 will inherit PE2's preference a
                                    ^^^^^
```
A comma may be missing after the conjunctive/linking adverb "Hence".
[Jorge] fixed



#### Section 4.3, paragraph 19
```
warder Election Algorithm different than the one configured in the rest of t
                                    ^^^^
```
Did you mean "different from"? "Different than" is often considered colloquial
style.
[Jorge] fixed



## Notes

This review is in the ["IETF Comments" Markdown format][ICMF], You can use the
[`ietf-comments` tool][ICT] to automatically convert this review into
individual GitHub issues. Review generated by the [`ietf-reviewtool`][IRT].

[ICMF]: https://github.com/mnot/ietf-comments/blob/main/format.md
[ICT]: https://github.com/mnot/ietf-comments
[IRT]: https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool


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