Two Lips and Seven Kisses
There was this old woman who heard a song called "Two Lips and Seven Kisses."
She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name
of the record company. In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and
she asks, "Do you have "Two Lips and Seven Kisses?"
The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, "No, but I have two nuts
and seven inches!"
So the woman asked, "Is this a record?"
To which the man replied, "No, its average!
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Banta, a black guy, and a white guy were driving through the desert when they
suddenly ran out of gas. They all decided to start walking to the nearest town
(which they had passed 50 miles back) to get some help.
A rancher was sitting on his front porch that evening when he saw the white guy
top the horizon and walk toward him. The rancher noticed that the white guy was
carrying a glass of water, so when he was within hearing distance, the rancher
said, Hi there... What are you doing carrying a glass of water through the
desert?
The white guy explained his predicament and explained that since he had a long
way to go, he might get thirsty, so that's why he was carrying the water.
A little while later the rancher noticed the black guy walking toward him with
a loaf of bread in his hand. What are you doing? Asked the rancher again.
As before, the black guy explained the situation and said that since he had a
long way to go, he might get hungry and that's why he had the bread.
Finally our Banta appeared, dragging a car door through the sand. More curious
than ever, the rancher asked, Hey, why are you dragging that car door?
Well, he said, I have a long way to go, so if it gets too hot, I'll roll down
the window.
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