Back from the Cold From Hell....
Dan Minette wrote:
>----- Original Message -----
>From: "K.Feete" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
>To: "Brin Listserve" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
>Sent: Sunday, July 22, 2001 10:52 PM
>Subject: Re: Loneliness in America
>
>>
>> However, I don't think religious *feeling* is at all strong in America
>> these days. Going to church doth not a Christian make; these people, at
>> least in my experience, have not found something to believe in but
>> something else to hide behind.
>
>Might I suggest that your casual observations of Christians may not be quite
>sufficient to totally fathom their interior spiritual life?
Heh, okay. I am having some considerable trouble answering this post in
any sort of context, so what I'm going to do at this point is sorta
describe my background and let y'all sort it out. I know I'm not
objective on this one. It'll probably end up L3 so anybody *not*
interested in reading my autobio should probably just cut out now.
When I was about 7 I made the mistake of telling my best friend at the
time that I didn't go to church. She gave me a look of absolute horror,
informed me very solemnly that I was going to hell, and never spoke to me
again. Niether did a good-sized chunk of the class, come to think of it.
That wasn't my first experience with religion; I'd grown up around, and
been babysat by, a community of Mennonites. I never actually connected
them with religion, though, so that was my first real *concious*
experience with religion. It's been something of a similar mixed bag all
through. The community I grew up in (after moving away from the
Menonnites- and I do apologize for the bloody misspelling) was hillybilly
and pretty straight Baptist, and, in spite of the many good things about
a rural community, there's some bad things too. Religious intolerance is
one.
My fourth grade teacher made the mistake of telling a Jewish boy he was
going to hell, and was severely repremanded by the school. The only
reason she was repremanded was that the boy's father was a lawyer. She
was actually quite a nice lady, as opposed to the sixth grade teacher,
who made all the Catholics sit on one side of the room, failed to teach
world history in any pre-Christian society if she could possibly help it,
and stood the kids with learning disabilities up in front of the class
while she read off their mistakes for those of us blessed by God to smirk
at. After sixth grade my parents pulled me out of school, for these and
other reasons.
My eye doctor is deeply Christian and highly intelligent. He knew my
parents were not Christians, respected them, and thus has carefully and
almost ritually avoided trying to convert me through most of my childhood
and only started once I was eighteen. I like him. We have lots of good
discussions, even if there's no chance he'll ever be able to convert me.
When I went to college I got another dose of Christianity, particularly
Catholicism, mainly in this case from kids who were trying to get away
from their parents' beliefs, conforming to their parents' beliefs without
really thinking about it, or more bloody missionaries. In the first case
I ran into some *really* strange ones, including the Catholic girl whose
father refused to let her out of the house in a t-shirt or shorts. In
Phoenix, Arizona. He also made her memorize the Bible and she was
terrified he would find out she was living in (horror!) a co-ed dorm. She
had a boyfriend whom, I might add, she was not sleeping with or living
with; her parents found out and by way of punishment for this virginal
relationship refused to let her younger sister visit. They didn't want
the girl corrupted, as they told my friend.
In the "confused" category we can rank the Catholic girl who, although
sleeping with her boyfriend, spent a lot of time and ire making my life
miserable because I slept with mine, including some rather interesting
conversations about flirtation. I am still a little confused on that one,
so we'll skip her. There was also the nympho Catholic flirter who would
literally do *anything* to a guy... so long as it was unrequited love...
but dump him the second he showed signs of paying attention to her. And,
sadly, we'll also have to rank my own ex-boyfriend here, him of the
strange "God is watching me" convictions, the one who dumped me over the
phone because "I want to date a *nice* girl- one who goes to Church."
So, okay, I am *not* particularly objective. I may even have a few issues
to work out in this area. Take what I say with a grain of salt.
I have, however, had considerably more than "superficial" observations of
a great many Christians. I haven't been impressed. Of course, I am
leaving out a number of quietly and sweetly religious people like my eye
doctor and the lovely lady I used to work for at the library, but
unfortunately, in my experience at least, they are minorities. The
majority seem- like the majority of most movements- to parrot the
rhetoric, go through the motions, and use their enlightened position as a
soapbox to look down on others.
Now, perhaps there are deep spiritual changes I'm not seeing, and forgive
me if it's so. I know, for example, that churches in general do a lot of
charity work. I respect that. I just don't seem to meet the people who
participate in that sort of thing very often. The ones I meet are always
the ones explaining to me exactly why poor people deserve to be poor
because they're degenerates and if they weren't God would reward them
with jobs.
The result of this doesn't seem to be any significant spiritual
enlightenment- if anything, judging by the way their kids turn out, the
reverse. People are very *smug* about their Christianity, but it doesn't
seem to affect the way they live one way or the other, and it doesn't
seem to fill any sort of superficial need. It's a cardboard comforter,
all form and no sacrifice. And, although I do understand the concept of
grace (didn't read the book you recommend- did read Milton), and I don't
expect all Christians to be "perfect" Christians, too many people I know
regard the fact that they go to church as an excuse to turn off the moral
part of their brain, which I don't think is the motivator beyond the
grace concept.
I'm not dissing Christianity. I'm saying that it's being used in much the
way markets- in the form of having a job or a nice car- are being used,
as a spiritual "Get Out of Jail Free" card, an automatic guaruntee of
happiness, enlightenment, or both. And as such, it doesn't work. Most of
the Christians I know aren't happy.
The rest of your post I'll answer seperately- no use giving people heart
attacks. <grin>
Kat Feete
---------
I think every truly religious person is a heretic at
heart because you can't be true to an established
agenda. You have to be true to what you think.
--Connie Willis
