Last night I was lucky enough to finally meet Adam and his wife in person,
along with assorted hangers-on.  I'm not sure I held up my end of the
conversation, but I had lots of fun, and I can feel my cognitive
dissonance diminishing as my brain slowly integrates the "real" Adam with
the online persona I've contstructed over the years. :-)  Thanks for the
invite, dude.

After dinner we saw Jay & Silent Bob, and I feel compelled to review it.
Although I enjoyed the movie, I'm beginning to think I'm a member of a
grossly overserved demographic.  Some spoilers may follow, if you're
worried about such things for this kind of flick.

Basically, this movie is "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, but, Like,
Their Balls Have Dropped This Time Around."  It's a long string
of geeky pop-culture riffs framed by a long string of gay jokes and dick
jokes framed by a plot about getting paid, getting laid, and getting
revenge, all constructed to loosely fit in with Kevin Smith's previous
movies.  I laughed a lot.  My favorite part was the treatment of
Internet fan communities.  I'm not sure how Joe Bob Briggs would rate it,
but I know he'd include the following observations:

Leathervixen-fu
Orangutan-fu
Tongue-fu
Scooby Doobie-fu
Bongsaber-fu
Gratuitous George Carlin
Gratuitous Carrie Fisher
Gratuitous and painful Mark Hamill
Gratuitous guy-who-stuck-his-dick-in-a-pie
Gratuitous SNL-actor-who-should-have-been-shot-years-ago

Like I said, I laughed a lot.  I think that this movie has something in
common with "Evil Dead 3: Army of Darkness," and that thing is this:  if I
were to take my father to see this movie, he would probably laugh enough
to make himself cry because he'd be trying to be more mature than that, and
fail, and then he'd come out of the theater feeling vaguely ashamed of himself
for enjoying it so much.

But I'm younger than that and more conditioned to this kind of humor, so
the thing that stays with me the most was this one scene where Silent Bob
was on the verge of giving Jay a blow job as a gambit to escape a Miramax
security guard, and it hit me:  I belong to a cultural milieu so obsessed
with media and so gifted with education and affluence that talented
directors like Kevin Smith are pretty much more than happy to give us
cinematic blow jobs like Jay and Silent Bob in order to make a little
bank, and if we think that what's happening is that we're all partaking
in a kind of exclusive geeky in-joke, that's fine, but it basically boils
down to giving these guys a ride in exchange for some head.  And if we
look at the proliferation of movies like Galaxy Quest and Scary Movie and
yada yada, it's obvious that there's a lot of head getting passed around.
And I truly love head, I do, but I'm starting to wonder when enough is
enough.

Marvin Long
Austin, Texas

My hero is Guy Forsyth!                              www.guyforsyth.com

"The ego that sees a 'thou' is fundamentally different from an ego that
sees an 'it.'"                                       -- Joseph Campbell

  • Wow Marvin Long, Jr.

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