On Oct 25, 2004, at 5:29 PM, Dan Minette wrote:

Erik Reuter wrote:

Do you have a different definition of good/better/best than Webster's?

I don't think so.

If I might hazard a guess, perhaps you are wondering if I am somehow
excusing people from responsibility for their actions by assming that
they are doing their best...?

Nick

I think the uncertainty is in how something can be better than the best.

Allow me to hazard a guess that "... their best" might refer to "the best
that they can do at this time." or "their best, given the light that they
have."


OK, it's not a guess: I am aware of a spiritual discipline of which the
practice of "assuming that people are doing their best" is a part. The
idea is not to excuse bad behavior or allow oneself to be abused, but to
hold in one's head the idea that the spectacular failure before you may
represent the best that the other has to offer right now. It has more to
do with detachment and having good boundaries than with excusing bad
behavior. It's the "judge not" part of a famous aphorism, where "judge"
is understood to mean "condemn," not "discern."

Dave

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