1) If I want to introduce a friend to the pleasures of traditional contras and squares, I'll think hard about which dance series I'd like them to experience first. Some are more beginner-friendly than others. Similarly with callers-- some are more attentive to the presence of beginners in the midst and program accordingly.
2) Having made that decision, when we arrive I'll make a point of introducing my friend to several experienced dancers whom I know. "So-and-so is here for the first time," I say, and the others fall right into line, each clamoring for the honor of having the first dance. In short, there are several excellent dancers who are going to be looking for opportunities to dance with this person. Similarly, as a caller at my home dance, when I see a group of newcomers arrive, in addition to greeting them myself if they come in the minutes before the dance starts, I'll alert some of the experienced dancers of the presence of the new folks and, if possible, will facilitate introductions. And by "experienced" I don't mean hot-shot dancers or folks who simply know how to do the figures, but rather dancers who have what I think of as a friendly, welcoming and supportive attitude, who understand the community basis of this kind of dancing. 3) And finally, it's worth telling your friend ahead of time that it's perfectly acceptable to say "no" if she doesn't want to dance with someone. > I know who the good female dancers are, but who the good male dancers are is more from an impression or reputation. Aha! An excellent argument for dancing the other sex's role from time to time! In addition to making oneself a better dancer, it's a chance to interact with the other half of the universe. When I dance the woman's role, for example, there's nothing like going down the set in a dance with lots of swings to give me a much better idea of dancers' skills and attitudes. Some guys simply smile and swing in a welcoming manner, while others seem to take it as a personal challenge to show how vigorous they can be. On a ladies chain, I quickly discover who gives a friendly courtesy turn, and who insists on cranking me around in twirls. I might even note particular individuals to speak with at a later time about dance etiquette. David Millstone
