Martha Edwards wrote:
>
> Even though he described what he meant (guy swings and a "bait and
> switch" gypsy to a two-hand-turn with a neighbor, who, in ECD is
> likely to be your same-gender person), I could not see how any dance
> move is, well, sexual, unless you yourself make it be. Heck, in the
> right hands, a down-the-hall-and-back can give you a thrill. But
> even a gypsy is just friendly, or it's funny, or it's a girl-power
> moment, or it's sisterly or brotherly, or it's none of these, it's
> just a walk around your neighbor facing in. So I didn't "get" the
> complaint and have no idea what to do with it other than tuck it
> away in the "go figure" box.
> 

In normal american culture, looking someone directly in the eyes for
more than a fraction of a second is very rare.  When it does happen,
it's generally between lovers.  In a swing or gypsy, you have several
times that much direct eye contact, and it's generally not with a
lover, so it's weird.  I would say it is, from a normal american
viewpoint, 'sexual', even without someone choosing to make it so.

As contra daners, we've mostly learned not to think of it that way.
Mostly.  But the sexual interpretation and connotations are still
present.  Imagine a man gypsing with a young girl.  If the man stared
directly into her eyes the whole time, as the figure entails and would
be standard with an older partner, contra dancers would widely
percieve this as somewhat creepy because it would be seen as partly or
possibly sexual.

Also in our culture there's a wide range of variation in who it is
acceptible to be sexual with and how much.  Factors include:
 - age (more difference in age, less acceptable)
 - marital status (married to someone else, less, married to each
   other, more)
 - gender (Opposite gender more acceptable. If same gender, female is
   more acceptable)
 - ...

Note that I'm not taking a position here, just trying to describe the
culture.  But I get the complaint: the unhappy male dancer did want to
do something generally percieved as somewhat sexual with someone
generally percieved as inappropriate for him to be sexual with.

I don't agree with the complaint; I think that if he paid attention he
would realize that in this group the eye contact did not indicate as
high amount of sexual involvement as he thought it did.  The complaint
makes sense, though.

Jeff

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