|==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==| MyFree.com's Fast Forward - 8/26/04 You Just GOTTA Share This With Somebody - Forward It Now! |==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==||==|
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Get Your Own Subscription Here: <a href=" http://join.myfree.com ">Click Now </a> TODAY'S Fast Forward: You Know It's Summer in Florida When... - When your car is overheating before you drive it. - Your computer won't work unless it has it's own AC blowing on it. - Hot air balloons can't go up, because the air outside is hotter than the heated air in the balloon - Airplanes can't land because the asphalt runways are too soft. - You discover that you can drive the car using only two fingers on the hot steering wheel. - The ducks in the park are designated "original recipe" and "extra crispy" -More hot water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one. - Your pool water boils so much in the sun that you can boil potatoes in ten minutes in it. - You burn the grass by watering it with the hose. - The hotdogs sold outside the Home Depot are actually hot - A hot shower cools you off. - The politicians have to take their hands out of your pockets to fan themselves - You cover the leather seats in the car with cloth or sit on towels. - At noon in July, the kids are on summer vacation, and no one is moving on the streets. - Sunscreen is sold at the front of the checkout counter, a formula less than 30 spf is a joke, and you wear it just to go shopping. - You burn your hand opening the car door and your rear end wearing shorts on the hot seats. - You notice the best parking place is determined by the shade under trees instead of the distance to the door. - Your dog refuses to go outside so you are forced to build and inside a/c toilet facility for it - All picnics feature hot food like it or not. - There is no such thing as "Cool Aid" - The beaches are over populated with natives instead of tourists. Carole Libbe, Your Fast Forward Editor If you have a favorite witticism, joke, poem you'd like to Fast Forward, submit it! Maybe you'll see your favorite in a future newsletter! <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=myf526 ">Click Here</a> ----------------------SPONSOR--------------------------- Clean Shave - Free Razor TheFranklinSurveys wants you to try the Gillette(r) Mach3 Power for free. Yes, you can get the latest Gillette(r) Mach3 Power for men complimentary while supplies last, a savings of about $15! The Mach3(r) Power features Gillette's unique triple-blade system and forward pivot system that allows the blade to adapt to the unique contours of a man's face. Claim yours now because they are going fast. <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=yfp501 ">Click Here</a> ----------------------SPONSOR--------------------------- ============================================================== LEAVES YOUR E-MAILBOX LEMONY FRESH! Tired of all the stinky stuff cluttering up your e-mail? Time for some sparkling, fresh new messages you'll really enjoy getting! Try out any of the dozens of fascinating FREE e-mail newsletters from MyFree.com - ranging from Free Stuff to Family Activities; Bargains to Daily Jokes; Cooking to Crafts; Sweepstakes to Fashion, and Health & Fitness to Business Success - and be entered automatically into our super Prize-A-Month Sweepstakes! Plus, get a FREE phone card! <a href=" http://join.myfree.com ">CLICK HERE NOW!</a> : : : : : : : : : : EDITOR'S NOTE : : : : : : : : : : Hillbilly Medical Terms Doctors know a fibula isn't really a small lie - but a hillbilly might not. Check out our hysterical list of other medical terms and what a hillbilly might think they mean. Have a look - have a laugh - and pass it along to your doctor or backwoods friend. <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=mfp72 ">Click Here</a> : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : . . . . . . 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