Well, if we're talking total "what if" fiction... Run into a local commissary/buffet (ideally somewhere like Morrison's where most of the clientele are retired) . Run in at full speed, vaulting over tables, trays, and other people. Furiously sprint (muttering incoherently) towards the buffet line, grabbing two handfuls of a "funny" food (let's say either scrambled eggs or banana pudding). With two handfuls of food, leap onto a table in the middle of the restaurant. Drop to your knees and throw your hands in the air holding the food up high (think "cover of Platoon" with scambled eggs). Scream "VICTORY!!!" a few times in proud, boastful tone. Then quietly dismount the table and gently place the food in a patron's plate. Give them a smile or a wink. Then sprint out the door as fast as you came in yelling "UP, UP, AND AWAY!!!! UP, UP, AND AWAY!!!!".
Completely dumb and over the top, but it would be a hoot to see how that was written up in the local paper. Jim Davis wrote: >[Another of my infrequent lists. Feel free to add your own.] > >I've always wanted to be in a situation where I could appropriately yell >"I'm giving her all she's got!" > >I've always wanted the power to force anybody, even heads of state and >church, to do the Truffle Shuffle. > >I've always wanted somebody, anybody, to point to the stunning brunette on >my arm, nudge the guy next to him and whisper loudly: "That's Maggie. The >Duke gave her to Jim to make him happy." > >I've always wanted to be thin. Or be first person to weigh a ton. Either >one, really. > >I've always wanted fruit to look as good in real life as it does on cartoon >cereal commercials. > >Jim Davis > > > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Purchase RoboHelp from House of Fusion, a Macromedia Authorized Affiliate and support the CF community. http://www.houseoffusion.com/banners/view.cfm?bannerid=59 Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:171337 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=11502.10531.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
