ROFL My way #1: Stuff a jumbo marshmallow in Martha's mouth, followed by a potato
-----Original Message----- From: Erika L. Walker-Arnold [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] Sent: Monday, January 28, 2002 3:19 PM To: CF-Community Subject: Martha Stewart vs Me Martha Stewart vs Me **** DISCLAIMER ***** I do actually prefer to use real potatoes for my mashed potatoes. :) ********************* Martha's way #1: Stuff miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. My way: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake, you are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway. *************** Martha's way #2: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. My way: Buy mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year. ************** Martha's way #3: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake. My way: Go to the bakery. They'll even decorate it for you. ************** Martha's way #4: If you accidentally over salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix me up". My way: If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too damn bad. My motto: I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad you think it tastes. *************** Martha's way #7: Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. My way: Martha, dear, the only reason this works is because you can't rub a lime on your forehead without getting lime juice in your eye, and then the problem isn't the headache anymore, it is because you are now BLIND! *************** Martha's way #8: Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. My way: Leftover wine? When the hell does THAT happen? *************** Martha's way #9: If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy. My way: Go ask the neighbor with the cute butt to do it. *************** Martha's way #10: Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. Just slice and rub raw potato on the stains and rinse. My way: Mashed potatoes will now be replacing the antibacterial soap in the handy dispenser next to my sink. ______________________________________________________________________ Get the mailserver that powers this list at http://www.coolfusion.com Archives: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/index.cfm?sidebar=lists
