Oh I didn't say I had her on the phone; just checking the voice mail messages to make sure she isn't threatening stuff to the kids or anything. She is not getting any help from me again, don't worry. I can't stand being lied to and you are right, I would not be doing her any favors. What I was agonizing over last night was how to be sure the kids are ok if I am not in touch, but I am going to leave that up to the long-term friend who knew her before she was like this. I did explain to her that I had had a chat with the authorites last night to assess their position and that the only reason she still has custody of her children this morning is that I called them from a payphone and refused to give either my name or hers. I also told her I better see absolutely NO hint that those children are not receiving excellent care in future. But yeah, its distracting as hell :)
Dana On Thu, 29 May 2003 14:04:35 -0500, Doug White <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Dana; > While this may sound harsh, but in the end it really isn't. You have no > responsibility to support that mother's social habits by providing child > care. > You are not doing her a favor by giving in to her begging either. > Substance > abusers will say anything to get their way, and truthfulness is nowhere > to be > found. > > I would hope you do not have a co-dependacy problem that will even cause > the > slightest twinge of guilt by turning her down flat. You are not helping > her, > you are not helping her kids. In fact by taking on the burden you are > actually > shielding her from the consequences of her choices. By refusing, you > will force > her to make better choices, or at the very least come up on the Child > Protective > Services radar screen. Sometimes just the threat by them to take away > the > children and placing them in foster care, is enough to make good things > happen, > but if in the end that is what needs to be done, it will be in the > children's > best interests, horrible as that may sound. Leaving them in that > situation is > what laws are supposed to prevent. > > This is not to day that you don't care, because you obviously do. > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/index.cfm?forumid=5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/index.cfm?method=subscribe&forumid=5 Get the mailserver that powers this list at http://www.coolfusion.com Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5
