> 1) Keep your Airborne friends close and hang out at the VFW hall.

<grandpa simpson>
And we used to keep onions in our belts...
</grandpa simpson>

> 2) Hang out with CF people in your spare time.

Fusebox.
MachII
Fusebox!!!
MachII!!!!
Fusebox!!!!!!!!
Benorama you fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> 3) Spend more time with the kids and get them to entertain you.

Can't you go to prison for that kind of thing?

> 4) Start going to church. Good people and insightful readings make for
> an active social life.

*shudder*

> 5) Follow local bands and support the scene.

Tim! You can be Parker Posey in Party Girl!

> 6) Taking a gourmet cooking class at one of the restaurants in DC. Sign
> up for out on the town nights.

Wow, this cleaver is sharp! Do blood and carrots go well together?

> 7) Become a member at the local gun club. Start putting ads in the back
> of Soldier of Fortune for weird stuff, like Nutria removal.

Does being on the BATF watchlist of domestic terrorists and working at the
State Dept go together?

> 8) Become friends with Eliza. Tell it anything you want.

Me: Why don't I have friends?
Eliza: Screw you! You want friends? Well I want to be a real shrink so I can
charge your whiny motherf*cking ass!

> 9) LAN parties and the gamerz who frequent them.

And then he could beat himself up for being such a nerd.

> 10) Start a political cause, like People for the Seventh Amendment. Go
> to popular places and hand out fliers. Decorate your car with bumper
> stickers advocating your cause. Get T-Shirts made and take pictures with
> lots of people wearing them.

Isn't that domestic terrorism again?

:-D

Hey, I saw an article that optimism doesn't help cure cancer. I'm just
getting a running start at not being cured.

-Kevin
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