Thank you, Mark. I was very sad to hear of Bingo’s passing. The thing that is so unusual to me is that for the few days prior to Bingo’s passing and then starting again today, my sister is all over me because I take care of my dogs. I do love Dolly & Desi; I do take care of them and love them and nurture them. Her dog, is left on its own in a back yard with a pool and no gate around it…he falls into the pool and drowns. I would think that means that no one is taking care of him; no one is making sure that he is safe. But, I am the one that is the target for taking care of my dogs.
I have had a long day of my sister ridiculing me. My nephew called when I was in terrible need of sleep to let me know that my other sister, his mother, is now under hospice and will be passing soon from pancreatic cancer. I was glad that he called me, because of something that happened over 15 years ago, there had been no contact with him. But, he called me to let me know what was happening and he said he would stay in touch with me. I told him that when he goes to see her this coming Thursday to give her a hug and a kiss from me and tell her that I love her…he said he would. So, I thought that I would call my other sister since my nephew had already called her, and then it turned into a hate fest. I am greedy and selfish; I am materialistic; and the big one – I didn’t take my Mom to the doctor enough. My mom was an adult and if she wanted to go to the doctor she would have…if she didn’t want to, what could I do? More important, how can someone accuse me…the one that had been there with my Mom all of my life and when the others had moved far away? It always turns nasty with her. I have been in tears, and I guess I was glad that she hung up on me. She told me that the thing that makes her the angriest is that I named my first dog Dolly Dee, which was a nickname that I used to call my Mom sometimes. I had told my Mom that when we moved here to Nevada that I was going to get a little female dog and call her Dolly Dee. She liked the idea. But, it is wrong that I take care of my dogs because she thinks that I didn’t take care of my Mom. I will never win with her. She wants me to send some of Mom’s jewelry to my dying sister. I tell her that the stuff that Mom wore all the time is here in one of my drawers. So I asked her what jewelry or bracelet that she was talking about, and she kept saying the ones that she wore to church all the time. Oh…so I tell her…the ones that I gave Mom? Then she told me that she didn’t believe for a minute that I bought Mom all the nice jewelry that she wore. My life is stuck in a little warp right now. I don’t have the physical energy; I don’t have the mental energy; I don’t have the time to listen to the ugliness and hatred that I have had to today. I am asking all that believe in the power of prayer to pray for my sister Barbara as she takes those last steps to the door of eternal life. I know that she is in good hands, and I believe that my nephew will pass on my message to her. I cannot travel right now…not only because of the brain surgery but because of my spinal injuries. If she were to say that she wanted to see me, I may risk it, but to go to the funeral after she passes would be more of a risk than a benefit. But, as you all pray for Barbara and her family as they take these last steps together, please also pray for my sister, Susie, to release some of the hatred and mean feelings that she has of me. I swear to all of you that read this message, that although I knew nothing about Lewy Body Dementia before Mom was diagnosed, it is a silent disease that only rears its ugly head maybe once a year at first…many things were attributed to lack of sleep or something and then just as fast as something happened, everything would go back to normal. For all the years that I was alone with my Mom, it was me that took her wherever she wanted to go. She gave her car to my brother in 1990, and from that time, I was her only source of transportation. From 1989 until 2005, I was the only family member that was there for Mom. It was me that took her to her doctor appts; it was me that used my sick leave and vacation when Mom was ill or something. It was perceived by my sister that I lived with Mom for free, and that could not be further from the truth. I treated my Mom like royalty. I would do anything that she asked me to do for her. I guess it is so easy to make assumptions from a distance when you really have NO knowledge or idea of what is going on. I had a horrible two years after my Mom passed away…no time to grieve because of family members accusing me of terrible things. I know that most of this is stuff that shouldn’t affect me, but when people attack my credibility, my compassion, and my love and dedication to my Mom, it does hurt inside even though I know that it is not true. So, Mark, I know that you are grieving your loss; I know that you loved your little one with all of your heart; I pray that your family and friends don’t attack you as mine have. I was having a horrible day, and now it is worse. I am trying to deal with everything, and God will get me through this, too. So, please…I am dealing with a lot, but with love and support from my friends, this shall pass. I have to think of Dolly & Desi and let them know that they are loved, and in return they give me so much love and happiness. I guess it is good that I have them, because they are probably the only true family that I have that love me in return. Prayers, prayers, prayers…Thank you all! From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Mark Strassler Sent: Sunday, May 29, 2011 3:35 PM To: [email protected] Subject: Re: [Chihuahuas] My sister's dog Hello: Sorry to hear about Bingo. I also hope you are doing well after your surgery. mark _____ From: Joan Croft <[email protected]> To: [email protected]; [email protected] Sent: Sat, May 28, 2011 4:33:39 PM Subject: [Chihuahuas] My sister's dog My sister has had some dogs in the past, but they all end up at her ex-husband’s house and he loves them and takes care of them. She was telling me a couple weeks ago about her rat terrier that has had epilepsy ever since she got him about 12 years ago. Her ex has been taking care of him, and now he is on his second wife since my sister. This morning I was on Facebook and read that the little rat terrier fell in the pool and drowned this morning. The dog was pretty much blind and deaf, and the ex-wife insisted that he go outside to go potty. Her daughters found him in the pool. My sister did love that dog, just isn’t the person who wants to be there for them all the time. So, Bingo has passed over to the bridge…she is crying. Maybe it will make her think of what a dog really means to her…maybe what my dogs mean to me. I know that this is a very harsh thing to happen, but sometimes in life you make comments about others and you don’t really think about what might happen to yourself. Well, I did meet Bingo once, and he was not all that attractive, but he was a wonderful dog that her ex took care of. Just wanted to share…timing is everything especially when you start dissing people about the way that they take good care of their dogs and then they have to see how their dogs maybe could have been more well taken care of.
