Not serious, but the intellectual credit here goes to George Boole--as in
"boolean arithmetic." Babbage/Lovelace machines were decimal.
At 02:01 PM 8/3/2001 -0400, Jennifer Cribbs wrote:
>Is this serious?
>
>I was under the impression that Ada Lovelace invented the binary counting
>system. I was also under the impression that John Atanasoff came up with
>the brilliant coding system that expressed everything in terms of two
>numbers for the methodology of measuring the current or lack of current in
>regards to computers way back in the 40's.
>
>Before that everyone kept trying to incorporate the base10 system in
>computers, which was a major headache and unsuccessfull, but that was in the
>vacuum tube days.
>
>hmmm. Surely Microsoft doesn't think they can do this..Maybe this is a joke
>however and I am just too d*** serious.
>
>Jenn
>
>
>-----Original Message-----
>From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]]On Behalf Of
>Natasha
>Sent: Friday, August 03, 2001 10:19 AM
>To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
>Subject: OT: Friday Funnie #2, Couldn't let this one go by!! [7:14809]
>
>
>REDMOND, WA--In what CEO Bill Gates called "an unfortunate but
>necessary step to protect our intellectual property from theft and
>exploitation by
>competitors," the Microsoft Corporation patented the numbers one and
>zero Monday.
>
>With the patent, Microsoft's rivals are prohibited from manufacturing
>or selling products containing zeroes and ones--the mathematical
>building blocks of all
>computer languages and programs--unless a royalty fee of 10 cents per
>digit used is paid
>to the software giant.
>
>
>"Microsoft has been using the binary system of ones and zeroes ever
>since its inception in 1975," Gates told reporters. "For years, in the
>interest of the
>overall health of the computer industry, we permitted the free and
>unfettered use of our proprietary
>numeric systems. However, changing marketplace conditions and the
>increasingly
>predatory practices of certain competitors now leave us with no choice
>but to seek
>compensation for the use of our numerals."
>
>A number of major Silicon Valley players, including Apple Computer,
>Netscape and Sun Microsystems, said they will challenge the Microsoft
>patent as
>monopolistic and anti-competitive, claiming that the 10-cent-per-digit
>licensing fee
>would bankrupt them instantly.
>
>"While, technically, Java is a complex system of algorithms used to
>create a platform-independent programming environment, it is, at its
>core, just
>a string of trillions of ones and zeroes," said Sun Microsystems CEO
>Scott McNealy, whose
>company created the Java programming environment used in many Internet
>applications.
>"The licensing fees we'd have to pay Microsoft every day would be
>approximately
>327,000 times the total net worth of this company."
>
>"If this patent holds up in federal court, Apple will have no choice
>but to convert to analog," said Apple interim CEO Steve Jobs, "and I
>have serious doubts whether
>this company would be able to remain competitive selling pedal-operated
>computers
>running software off vinyl LPs."
>
>As a result of the Microsoft patent, many other companies have begun
>radically revising their product lines: Database manufacturer Oracle has
>embarked on a
>crash program to develop "an abacus for the next millennium." Cisco,
>whose
>communications and networking systems are also subject to Microsoft
>licensing fees, is
>working with top animal trainers on a chimpanzee-based
>message-transmission system.
>Hewlett-Packard is developing a revolutionary new steam-powered printer.
>
>Despite the swarm of protest, Gates is standing his ground,
>maintaining that ones and zeroes are the undisputed property of
>Microsoft.
>
>
>
>Above: Gates explains the new patent to Apple Computer's board of
>directors. "We will vigorously enforce our patents of these numbers, as
>they are
>legally ours," Gates said. "Among Microsoft's vast historical archives
>are Sanskrit
>cuneiform tablets from 1800 B.C. clearly showing ones and a symbol known
>as 'sunya,' or nothing.
>We also own: papyrus scrolls written by Pythagoras himself in which he
>explains the
>idea of singular notation, or 'one'; early tracts by Mohammed ibn Musa
>al Kwarizimi
>explaining the concept of al-sifr, or 'the cipher'; original
>mathematical manuscripts by
>Heisenberg, Einstein and Planck; and a signed first-edition copy of
>Jean-Paul Sartre's Being
>And Nothingness. Should the need arise, Microsoft will have no
>difficulty proving to
>the Justice Department or anyone else that we own the rights to these
>numbers."
>
>Added Gates: "My salary also has lots of zeroes. I'm the richest man
>in the world."
>
>According to experts, the full ramifications of Microsoft's patenting
>of one and zero have yet to be realized.
>
>"Because all integers and natural numbers derive from one and zero,
>Microsoft may, by extension, lay claim to ownership of all mathematics
>and logic
>systems, including Euclidean geometry, pulleys and levers, gravity, and
>the basic
>Newtonian principles of motion, as well as the concepts of existence and
>nonexistence," Yale
>University theoretical mathematics professor J. Edmund Lattimore said.
>"In other words,
>pretty much everything."
>
>Lattimore said that the only mathematical constructs of which
>Microsoft may not be able to claim ownership are infinity and
>transcendental numbers like pi.
>Microsoft lawyers are expected to file liens on infinity and pi this
>week.
>
>Microsoft has not yet announced whether it will charge a user fee to
>individuals who wish to engage in such mathematically rooted motions as
>walking, stretching
>and smiling.
>
>In an address beamed live to billions of people around the globe
>Monday, Gates expressed confidence that his company's latest move will,
>ultimately,
>benefit all humankind.
>
>"Think of this as a partnership," Gates said. "Like the ones and
>zeroes of the binary code itself, we must all work together to make the
>promise of the computer
>revolution a reality.
>
>As the world's richest, most powerful software company, Microsoft is
>number one. And you, the millions of consumers who use our products, are
>the zeroes."
>--
>Natasha Flazynski
>CCNA, MCSE
>http://www.ciscobot.com
>My Cisco information site.
>http://www.botbuilders.com
>Artificial Intelligence and Linux development
>------------------------------------------------
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