May I have permission to forward this? STILL laughing!
Suze Cheryle McMillan wrote: > > 1. After trying forever to obtain that elusive second major, you have no problem >getting the third major the next day. > > 2. The novice people that enter every show and always show up even if the breed >judging is at 8 am and the show is a six hour drive will not show up when the count is > exactly a major. Or if they do, the dog that finished yesterday will be moved up and >break the major anyway. > > 3. If you attempt to build a major, one of the extras will win, never the dog the >major was worked around. > > 4. The day you don't take an umbrella or raincoat to the show because the weather is >beautiful at your house, is the day it is raining (or snowing) at the outdoor show >site. > > 5. Although all dog shows have lots of vendors, the day you forget the tack box is >the day there are > NO vendors on the premises selling show leads. > > 6. If you go to the trouble of checking out of the hotel before leaving for the >show, you will not win the breed. > > 7. If you don't check out, you will win the breed, and there will be no time to do >so before groups. > > 8. Your national will always be scheduled so that you are forced to move your >immature puppy up, by just a few days. > > 9. Your dog will decide to completely blow coat just after entries close for the >national, which you have already committed major bucks to attend. > > 10. If you are showing dogs in two different breeds that have the same judge, it is >inevitable that one breed will be the first one in at 8:00 am, and the other will be >the last one of the day at 2:30 p.m. > > 11. The day you say, "If Rover doesn't win today, this will be his last show and I'm >putting him in a pet home" will be the day he wins a four point major. (After which, >of course, the waiting list of pet homes disappears and he never gets another point.) > > 12. And of course we all know about the puppy we sold as a pet with a spay/neuter >contract. And his littermate that we kept as a show prospect. > > 13. If your dog does better behind other dogs, you will draw the first place number >and the judge will insist on catalogue order. > > 14. If your dog does better at the front of the line, the judge > will allow you to line up in any order and someone will beat you to the first spot. > > 15. If the judge is requiring the dogs to be shown in catalogue order, your male >special will be sandwiched in between two bitches in full standing season. If you are >showing a bitch special in season, she will be the only girl in a ring full of >attractive males. (And if you decide to leave your special home because he or she has >gone boy/girl crazy, none of the other specials entered will show up.) > > 16. The judge you didn't enter under because he/she hates your dog will draw an >overload and your breed will be given to a judge who loves your dog. > > 17. Whenever a premium list includes a group judge that loves your special, the >breed judge will be the one who told you to neuter it and put it in a pet home. (But >if you don't enter, remember that rule 16 applies). > > 18. A particular judge will ALWAYS put the Winners Dog up for Best of Winners, >unless YOUR dog goes WD and there is only a major in bitches. > > 19. If you enter a small show where there are normally no specials or only one, >three of the top ten dogs will be flown in from all over the country. > > 20. If you do win an easy breed at a small show in Podunk Nowhere, you will then >learn that a dozen top dogs and professional handlers have flown in from the farthest >corners of the country, and every one of them will show up in YOUR group. > > 21. If you win the group, you will discover that the BIS judge's favourite dog, who >is the all time top winning dog in its breed, has just won it's group, and the BIS >judge has recently given it a BISS. > > Author Unknown > > ========================================================= > "Magic Commands": > to stop receiving mail for awhile, click here and send the email: > mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]?body=SET%20CKCS-L%20NOMAIL > to start it up gain click here: > mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]?body=SET%20CKCS-L%20MAIL > > E-mail [EMAIL PROTECTED] for assistance. > Search the Archives... http://apple.ease.lsoft.com/archives/ckcs-l.html > > All e-mail sent through CKCS-L is Copyright 2002 by its original author. -- Suze at Llawen Cavaliers "...I have seen that in any great undertaking it is not enough for a man to depend simply upon himself." -Isna Ia-wica "Thought comes before speech" Luther Standing Bear ========================================================= "Magic Commands": to stop receiving mail for awhile, click here and send the email: mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]?body=SET%20CKCS-L%20NOMAIL to start it up gain click here: mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]?body=SET%20CKCS-L%20MAIL E-mail [EMAIL PROTECTED] for assistance. Search the Archives... http://apple.ease.lsoft.com/archives/ckcs-l.html All e-mail sent through CKCS-L is Copyright 2002 by its original author.
