>Hello, welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline. > >If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 again and again. > >If you are co-dependent, get someone to press 2. > >If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8. > >If you are a sadist, hang up and call again. > >If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are. We traced >this call. We're on our way. > >If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice >will tell you which number to press. > >If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter. No one will >answer. > >Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Hotline
