Just to be clear it was a literal bus of international students, about 20. The question was has this ever happened to you and how did you handle it. It is a challenge and I thought the purpose of this group was to help each other be better equipped to handle such challenges graciously. I value all people and welcome them all and encourage them all. I feel like people are judging and being a little condescending. Sorry, this is just getting too preachy.
Get TypeApp for Android On Jan 21, 2023, 2:48 PM, at 2:48 PM, Amy Wimmer via Contra Callers <[email protected]> wrote: >To reiterate further I will elaborate on Meg's and Harris's points: >"invasion" is not only a poor word choice, it's a dangerous mindset. >Your >attitude will be evident to _all_ the dancers, making the new folks >feel >uncomfortable, and encouraging some regulars to not be welcoming. Did >you >actually say the words "throw them out" if they kept being noisy? Both >these scenarios make _me_ uncomfortable, even as a white woman. Words >are >very powerful. Word choice matters. > >I've called dances where what I call a "bus load" of beginners showed >up >after the lesson. They arrive together, they probably bused or >carpooled >together, they know one another. They will want to dance with each >other, >not just as couples, but in clumps of foursomes, not and necessarily >with >people they don't know. It's a challenge. It would be way more of a >challenge if their cultural practices didn't allow them to touch >someone >appearing to be a different gender. > >For the noise, after politely asking for their attention one thing to >try >is to get quiet yourself, and see if they notice and follow suit. Then >ask >for their help with the noise level so everyone can enjoy the evening. >Your >calm attitude will be noticed by the regulars, and it will gain their >respect. Hollering will do the opposite. > >I think a demonstration of contra dance on campus might be helpful. Do >it >in a public area, invite other clubs/groups to come watch. You wouldn't >need to do a lesson, but could point out how the progression works, how >contra is a very community-centered dance form, where you dance with >everyone. > >Side note: this sounds like a good time to plan ahead for a similar >situation, and collect, or write, dances that might work for them. > >I wish you good luck and growth for your community. > >-Amy > >On Sat, Jan 21, 2023, 8:36 AM Joe Harrington via Contra Callers < >[email protected]> wrote: > >> [I don't know why, but the top paragraph and a half of my message >somehow >> came through white on white in both my email readers, so I'm >resending,] >> >> We had an interesting and challenging situation come up at Contra >Knights, >> the UCF student contra club, last night. I’m interested in your >thoughts >> and advice, in case it has come up before, which it must have. I’m >going to >> relate it as I perceived it, though someone more perceptive might >have made >> some observations early on that would have alerted them to the nature >of >> the situation. >> >> Last night was the second dance of the semester and officer elections >were >> scheduled during the break. Just at the end of my newbie lesson, a >group of >> nine women dribbled in as a group. They were really enthusiastic to >learn, >> and they were about 30% of the people in the room at that point, so I >> rewound the lesson a bit to at least teach them the swing. >> >> They had joined the teaching circle with their purses and backpacks. >I >> invited them to put their stuff on the chairs at the sides, including >their >> jackets, as we dance to up-tempo pop music and it can get sweaty. >That’s >> where it got interesting. Some put their stuff down, but they >couldn’t >> take off their jackets. That’s when I noticed some of them wearing >> headscarves. Ok, no worries, wear jackets, that’s fine. We love >diversity >> here. >> >> I tried matching them with experienced dancers, which some accepted >and >> some did not. Some said they just wanted to dance together and not >with >> anybody else. O-kay. I explained that in this dance we all dance with >each >> other in a sequence and we don’t control whom we’re dancing with. >Well, >> that’s ok, as long as we don’t touch men. >> >> This, of course, explained the refused partners; they were all men. >How >> are we going to manage that in a gender-neutral dance? It’s not like >I >> could put them in the men’s role. Someone suggested they turn all >moves >> into do-si-dos. I was at a momentary loss, when our club >president-to-be >> (elected later in the night) suggested putting them in a line of >their own. >> That made them happy, though it was a very short line. >> >> Then the rest of what turned out to be the Lebanese Student Society >came >> into the room. Their meeting in a neighboring room had just ended. >There >> were more women, enough to make the small line danceable. There were >a lot >> of men, and they had a really difficult time taking partners. I had >minor >> sets with five or six dancers (yes, experienced dancers can do it). I >told >> them it would not work that way, but they said they’d make it work, >and >> nothing I could say got anywhere. I was conscious of the original >dancers >> who had been there 30 minutes now, had done the workshop, and were >eager to >> dance. >> >> So, the men also got their own line, but things in that line got a >bit >> crazy during the first walk-through. Possibly because of the >discomfort >> some may have felt dancing with other men, many there were more >interested >> in goofing off or boasting to one another than in paying any >attention to >> me, even after I cranked the mic volume way up and admonished them to >be >> quiet and listen. There was some genuine interest in that line, and >one of >> the louder argument points I heard was someone shouting to quiet the >line, >> as they were here to learn. >> >> At this point there were around 30 Lebanese students in two lines of >3-4 >> minor sets each and 20 originals, who had joined through the newbie >> session, which was evenly split between newbies and experienced >dancers. >> Their line was quiet, but getting quite impatient at this point. I >was >> afraid to lose them. I was really afraid of what would happen in the >> election later on if the Lebanese club stayed, as they outnumbered >the >> originals. >> >> It became clear that the Lebanese men were not going to get far, but >they >> didn’t realize it yet. I really didn’t want to throw them out, since >some >> really did want to learn and we are an inclusive club with too few >members. >> I did say I would kick them out if they didn’t quiet down, which >worked >> momentarily. >> >> I decided to forge ahead and call to the group of 20. Either the guys >were >> going to get it or they’d maybe leave. If their noise disrupted the >line of >> originals, then I would ask them to leave. I put on a tune and called >an >> easy dance, cranking the volume above the din. The originals danced >it fine >> and seemed to have a good time. The guy line dispersed and said >they’d come >> in time for the workshop next time. The ladies left with them. >> >> The originals nearly all stayed. We had a fun rest of our night and >held >> our officer election. While last night was a unique event, 50% >newbies is >> common and we think it’s why we get so few dancers to stay in the >club more >> than three nights. So, one of the changes is a new, occasional, >no-newbies >> night, so the experienced dancers can dance something more complex >than >> Airpants. >> >> Are there ways to calm an unruly crowd? I have a fairly decent >one-night >> stand routine, but I worried I’d lose my originals if we went over to >that. >> I felt I could have taught them something if only I could just have >gotten >> their attention. Throwing them out would have been uncomfortable, at >best. >> >> So, could I have done this any better? Has your dance ever been >invaded, >> and how did you handle it? >> >> Thanks, >> >> —jh— >> Joe Harrington >> Faculty advisor and caller to Contra Knights, the UCF contra club >> Organizer, Greater Orlando Contra Dance >> Contraknights.org >> FB, Ig: Contra Knights >> [email protected] >> >> On Sat, Jan 21, 2023 at 10:24 AM Joe Harrington ><[email protected]> >> wrote: >> >>> We had an interesting and challenging situation come up at Contra >>> Knights, the UCF student contra club, last night. I’m interested in >your >>> thoughts and advice, in case it has come up before, which it must >have. I’m >>> going to relate it as I perceived it, though someone more perceptive >might >>> have made some observations early on that would have alerted them to >the >>> nature of the situation. >>> >>> Last night was the second dance of the semester and officer >elections >>> were scheduled during the break. Just at the end of my newbie >lesson, a >>> group of nine women dribbled in as a group. They were really >>> enthusiastic to learn, and they were about 30% of the people in the >room at >>> that point, so I rewound the lesson a bit to at least teach them the >swing. >>> >>> They had joined the teaching circle with their purses and backpacks. > I >>> invited them to put their stuff on the chairs at the sides, >including their >>> jackets, as we dance to up-tempo pop music and it can get sweaty. >That’s >>> where it got interesting. Some put their stuff down, but they >couldn’t >>> take off their jackets. That’s when I noticed some of them wearing >>> headscarves. Ok, no worries, wear jackets, that’s fine. We love >diversity >>> here. >>> >>> I tried matching them with experienced dancers, which some accepted >and >>> some did not. Some said they just wanted to dance together and not >with >>> anybody else. O-kay. I explained that in this dance we all dance >with >>> each other in a sequence and we don’t control whom we’re dancing >with. >>> Well, that’s ok, as long as we don’t touch men. >>> >>> This, of course, explained the refused partners; they were all men. >How >>> are we going to manage that in a gender-neutral dance? It’s not >like I >>> could put them in the men’s role. Someone suggested they turn all >moves >>> into do-si-dos. I was at a momentary loss, when our club >president-to-be >>> (elected later in the night) suggested putting them in a line of >their own. >>> That made them happy, though it was a very short line. >>> >>> Then the rest of what turned out to be the Lebanese Student Society >came >>> into the room. Their meeting in a neighboring room had just ended. >There >>> were more women, enough to make the small line danceable. There were >a lot >>> of men, and they had a really difficult time taking partners. I had >minor >>> sets with five or six dancers (yes, experienced dancers can do it). >I told >>> them it would not work that way, but they said they’d make it work, >and >>> nothing I could say got anywhere. I was conscious of the original >dancers >>> who had been there 30 minutes now, had done the workshop, and were >eager to >>> dance. >>> >>> So, the men also got their own line, but things in that line got a >bit >>> crazy during the first walk-through. Possibly because of the >discomfort >>> some may have felt dancing with other men, many there were more >interested >>> in goofing off or boasting to one another than in paying any >attention to >>> me, even after I cranked the mic volume way up and admonished them >to be >>> quiet and listen. There was some genuine interest in that line, and >one of >>> the louder argument points I heard was someone shouting to quiet the >line, >>> as they were here to learn. >>> >>> At this point there were around 30 Lebanese students in two lines of >3-4 >>> minor sets each and 20 originals, who had joined through the newbie >>> session, which was evenly split between newbies and experienced >dancers. >>> Their line was quiet, but getting quite impatient at this point. I >was >>> afraid to lose them. I was really afraid of what would happen in the >>> election later on if the Lebanese club stayed, as they outnumbered >the >>> originals. >>> >>> It became clear that the Lebanese men were not going to get far, but >they >>> didn’t realize it yet. I really didn’t want to throw them out, since >some >>> really did want to learn and we are an inclusive club with too few >members. >>> I did say I would kick them out if they didn’t quiet down, which >worked >>> momentarily. >>> >>> I decided to forge ahead and call to the group of 20. Either the >guys >>> were going to get it or they’d maybe leave. If their noise disrupted >the >>> line of originals, then I would ask them to leave. I put on a tune >and >>> called an easy dance, cranking the volume above the din. The >originals >>> danced it fine and seemed to have a good time. The guy line >dispersed and >>> said they’d come in time for the workshop next time. The ladies left >with >>> them. >>> >>> The originals nearly all stayed. We had a fun rest of our night and >held >>> our officer election. While last night was a unique event, 50% >newbies is >>> common and we think it’s why we get so few dancers to stay in the >club more >>> than three nights. So, one of the changes is a new, occasional, >no-newbies >>> night, so the experienced dancers can dance something more complex >than >>> Airpants. >>> >>> Are there ways to calm an unruly crowd? I have a fairly decent >one-night >>> stand routine, but I worried I’d lose my originals if we went over >to that. >>> I felt I could have taught them something if only I could just have >gotten >>> their attention. Throwing them out would have been uncomfortable, at >best. >>> >>> So, could I have done this any better? Has your dance ever been >invaded, >>> and how did you handle it? >>> >>> Thanks, >>> >>> —jh— >>> Joe Harrington >>> Faculty advisor and caller to Contra Knights, the UCF contra club >>> Organizer, Greater Orlando Contra Dance >>> Contraknights.org >>> FB, Ig: Contra Knights >>> [email protected] >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> _______________________________________________ >> Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] >> To unsubscribe send an email to >[email protected] >> > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ > >_______________________________________________ >Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] >To unsubscribe send an email to >[email protected]
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