Hmm, Okay, the following thoughts and advice comes from someone who is 40
and still dealing with parents who constantly doubt my ability even though
I've lived away from home for nearly twenty years, graduated college, held
jobs in other states, and basically did what any nonblind person has done as
far as life goes. I'm not trying to be condescending or mean when I give
you these choices:
1. let mom or dad cut your food forever, or at least until you move out.
Are you thinking of going to college? If so then you've only got what? Two
years to endure it, assuming they'll let you out of their sights.
2. If number 1 isn't an option, explain calmly and rationally why this is
something you need to learn. Maybe they just don't think you need to
because they'll always be around to do it for you. This can be tricky
because many parents and friends do this out of a misguided sense of love
and not necessarily anything sinister like trying to keep the blind kid
down. do you have other siblings? If they aren't blind, how do your
parents treat them when it comes to this sort of thing?
3. do you know if there is a chapter of the NFB or ACB in your area? I
don't want to side with either organization here. In fact I think either
one would be able to give you hands on advice or refer you to someone who
could. You have net access at home or at least in school, right? Ggo to
either www.acb.org or www.nfb.org and search by state to see where the
nearest chapter is. Both organizations have all kinds of resources for
people at all stages of life and I believe both also have organizations of
students, most of which are high school or college students who might be in
the same place you are.
I can relate to you wanting to look like everyone else. I grew up around
only sighted people, so everything I did was monitored and critiqued so I'd
look like a sighted person even though I had bad eyes and learning nonvisual
methods would have made things so much easier.
Cutting food is one of those basics everyone should learn. Granted many
people don't do it the approved Miss Manners way, but it gets done.
The reality is, everyone does it differently, even sighted people. Once you
quit comparing yourself to sighted people and even other blind people,
things will be much less stressful for you. There are some people who think
that doing something other then their way is the wrong way, and you can
really work yourself into stressed out state if you're always trying to
please these people.
The thing is, most of us have encountered this attitude from friends and
family. It's hard to break away if you're made to feel inferior or
disrespectful. But if you're serious about wanting some independence,
you're going to have to find ways to learn things even though your parents
will interpret this as being rebellious. The worst case sinerio is you have
to leave your parents house completely to learn something basic like this.
Unfortunately, I know lots of blind people who have had to do just that,
including myself. .
Lisa Belville
[email protected]
[email protected]
----- Original Message -----
From: "jessica" <[email protected]>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 9:33 PM
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
I look at it differently.
sent from my BrailleNote
----- Original Message -----
From: "Drew Hunthausen" <[email protected]
To: <[email protected]
Date sent: Mon, 23 Jan 2012 19:29:38 -0800
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
The way I look at it is that it's always worth a try if you really want
it.
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of jessica
Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 7:21 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
No thank you. I would not be able to explane that to my mom and
dad.
sent from my BrailleNote
----- Original Message -----
From: "Drew Hunthausen" <[email protected]
To: <[email protected]
Date sent: Mon, 23 Jan 2012 19:02:55 -0800
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
Where do you live? I'm asking because there might be some
assistance you can
get from non profit organizations that wouldn't require you to
leave home.
Just a thought
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of
jessica
Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 6:42 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
I can not get help from a rehab teacher and I can not go to a
blind school because my mom and dad will not let me. I would love
to go there though.
sent from my BrailleNote
----- Original Message -----
From: "Charles Rivard" <[email protected]
To: <[email protected]
Date sent: Mon, 23 Jan 2012 20:35:07 -0600
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
Why not? This is something they should provide, or, if need be,
they can
send you to a rehab center, or you can go to one, to take classes
on stuff
like this. Just a thought. Another thought is this: Did, or
do, you
attend a school for the blind? Although they should teach these
skills,
they unfortunately quite often do not.
---
Shepherds are the best beasts, but Labs are a close second.
----- Original Message -----
From: "jessica" <[email protected]
To: <[email protected]
Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 6:03 PM
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
I can not get help from a rehab teacher.
sent from my BrailleNote
----- Original Message -----
From: Allison Fallin <[email protected]
To: Cooking in the Dark <[email protected]
Date sent: Mon, 23 Jan 2012 17:42:36 -0600
Subject: Re: [CnD] cutting food
Hi Jessica,
I know how hard it is, particularly as a teenager, to not be
worried about how things look. Your concern reminds me of a
story my husband tells. When he was in his late teens, his
older
brother urged him to use a cane or dog. He was reluctant,
because it would make him look blind. As his brother said:
"well, you are blind, and people can see that." Once he thought
about it, he knew that was true.
I came in late on this thread, so you may have answered this.
Can you get any help from a rehab teacher? It's hard to have
family members teach you, at least it was for me.
One further thought. Given the state of the airline industry
right now, you won't have to worry about cutting food on a
plane.
You never have to cut peanuts, assuming you even get those.
Lol.
Allison Fallin
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