[To describe Monica as "The little minx" reveals Coulter, at
very least, as an unobservant reporter...or was it an attempt at
irony? "Fat slut pig" would closer to the truth, though perhaps
not PC. --MS]
Capitol Hill Blue-May 26, 2000
TOO CORRUPT TO BE AN ARKANSAS LAWYER
By Ann Coulter
It's not Judgment Day yet, but Linda Tripp is off the hook, and
President Clinton is facing disbarment. The Committee on
Professional Conduct of the Arkansas Supreme Court has
recommended that Clinton be disbarred, and the final sanction
will now be determined by one of five circuit court judges. Just
for the record, every single one of the judges is a registered
Democrat, according to The New York Times.
I don't know about you, but the president's disbarment would
really perk me up. The history books would then be able to record
that the U.S. Senate found a man who is too corrupt to be an
Arkansas lawyer perfectly fit to be president. Indeed, in the end
it may turn out that the only tribunal to consider Clinton's
conduct and refuse to impose a penalty will have been the U.S.
Senate.
The history books can already record that Clinton is the first
sitting president ever to face disbarment proceedings. He's
really rounding out his list of "firsts": the first president to
have his semen analyzed by the FBI, the first president to have
his capacity to induce orgasm described on national TV, the first
president to use White House sinks as sexual aids, the first
president to be accused of rape within two weeks of being
acquitted in an impeachment trial, and, well, the list goes on.
The usual assortment of criminal defense lawyers have been making
the rounds insisting that the president's conduct does not "rise
to the level" of disbarment. Moreover, everybody lies, molests
the staff, gives false testimony, importunes his secretary to
perjure herself, and bombs foreign countries to distract from his
personal problems.
Most winning on the crucial everybody-does-it point was F. Lee
Bailey, who claimed on CNN's "Larry King Live" that if "all the
lawyers who have lied about the fact they had a little affair on
the side should turn in their licenses" then "Shakespeare will
have won. We will have killed all the lawyers." I wondered how
his wife was enjoying that part of the show.
The members of the Disciplinary Committee that recommended
disbarment have come under the usual attacks -- they are partisan
Clinton-haters, probably tobacco lawyers, and may have once had a
DWI. Larry Flynt will be on the case soon. (Another 50 pounds,
and Clinton will be Larry Flynt soon.)
The New York Times' editorial brief for the president explained
that "Judge Wright ultimately dismissed the Jones case and ruled
that Mr. Clinton's disputed testimony was not germane, so it is
hard to argue that his false testimony harmed anyone."
No, but see: The only reason Clinton's sworn lies didn't "harm
anyone," and Paula Jones got her reputation back, was that Linda
Tripp kept tapes that exposed his lies. But for Linda Tripp, the
president's perjury and subornation of perjury most certainly
would have hurt Paula. (Which reminds me -- the members of the
Arkansas Disciplinary Committee that recommended disbarment have
not yet been accused of living in trailer parks. F. Lee Bailey
should get right on that.)
Moreover, it takes an unbelievable amount of gall to cite Judge
Susan Webber Wright for the proposition that Clinton's lies
didn't "harm anyone" and were not "germane" -- and therefore
should not lead to disbarment. It was Judge Wright who referred
Clinton's case to the Disciplinary Committee for action. It was
Judge Wright who held the president in "contempt" for giving
"intentionally false" testimony about "material" facts -- as she
herself wrote.
So the claim that the president's perjury was not legally
"germane" has gone the way of his denial of an affair with
Gennifer Flowers. Someone ought to pull the Times editors aside
and tell them to stay on message: Members of the Disciplinary
Committee are "right-wing Republicans" and "trailer park trash."
Indeed, Judge Wright held the president in contempt for only some
of his many, many perjuries. Among other whoppers, she cited "the
president's deposition testimony regarding whether he had ever
been alone with Ms. Lewinsky" and "his statements regarding
whether he had ever engaged in sexual relations with Ms.
Lewinsky" as "intentionally false." But when she referred
Clinton's case to the Disciplinary Committee, she also noted --
"this court is fully aware that the president may have engaged in
other contumacious conduct warranting the imposition of
sanctions."
I'm not sure how it works, but I'm really looking forward to the
disbarment proceeding. I bet Al Gore is, too. If I were the
judge, when Clinton's lawyers raise that "legally accurate" thing
again, I would demand testimony from Monica Lewinsky on how
"legally accurate" she thought Clinton was. The little minx would
just be getting to the "irony" of her having the "first orgasm of
the relationship" (as she says in "Monica's Story") about the
time of the Democratic National Convention.
COPYRIGHT 2000 UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE
Published on May 26, 2000
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Kadosh, Kadosh, Kadosh, YHVH, TZEVAOT
FROM THE DESK OF: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
*Mike Spitzer* <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
~~~~~~~~ <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
The Best Way To Destroy Enemies Is To Change Them To Friends
Shalom, A Salaam Aleikum, and to all, A Good Day.
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