from: http://www.aci.net/kalliste/ Click Here: <A HREF="http://www.aci.net/kalliste/">The Home Page of J. Orlin Grabbe</A> ----- Al Gore vs. Lyndon LaRouche "His nipples entered the room like an advance security team." by Mark Steyn PRIMARY season isn't, technically, over. The Democrats had one down in Arkansas the other day - 78 per cent voted for Al Gore while the other 22 per cent voted for Lyndon LaRouche, the distinguished felon and eccentric who claims the Queen is behind the international drug trade. Let's hope Al sees off this latest challenge - President LaRouche parachuting DEA assault teams into the grounds of Buckingham Palace might lead to a certain tension in the "special relationship". I won't pretend to understand the minds of the Arkansan electorate, and even President-in-waiting LaRouche seemed surprised by the result: he never campaigned during the primary yet he performed better against Gore in Arkansas than Bill Bradley did in states he spent months schlepping around. Some say it was just a bit of mischief-making by Gore-baiters, others that some of those upcountry swamp-dwellers had confused Mr LaRouche with his fellow Lyndon, the late President Johnson. But neither explanation quite accounts for 50,000 real, live Arkansans delivering nearly a quarter of the De mocratic vote to the publisher of such tomes as Jail Cocaine Kingpin George Bush (referring to George Snr). Whatever the reason, the fact that even Bill Clinton's home state is antipathetic to his chosen successor is merely the latest wobbly indicator for Mr Gore. Isn't it supposed to be Dubya who's in trouble? After Super Tuesday, the consensus was that Gore had emerged from the primaries much stronger than Bush. As you'll recall, Bush had supposedly run a vicious, negative campaign against McCain that had left the GOP hopelessly divided; utterly repelled the moderate, centrist voters he'd need; destroyed his image and exposed him as an empty suit with no ideas. Hmm. I think the media are indulging in what the psychologists call "displacement". There is a guy who ran a vicious, negative campaign that's left his party divided and repelled moderate centrists, but his name's not Dubya. The Republicans may have had to use a cattle prod to get McCain to endorse Bush, but at least he did it. Over in the Democratic camp, Bradley's still refusing to endorse Gore. New ideas? Dubya's got a zillion, all of which the vice-president dismisses as a "risky scheme". Al's campaigning as a human Denver boot: stay exactly where you are, America; do not attempt to move. Empty suit? Al's got an empty suit hanging in his closet. His advisers told him to squeeze into polo shirts and casual pants that would seem indecently tight on a Chippendale. When he was campaigning up here in New Hampshire, his nipples entered the room like an advance security team. Stumping the banks of the Connecticut River, the vice-president's sculpted butt, squeezed into jeans two sizes too small, looked like some novelty scale model of the landscape - the mountains and the giant cleavage of the Connecticut river valley in between. And yet, despite his butt, the women voters who turned out for Clinton don't want to know. He reminds me a bit of Barbie's boyfriend, Ken: he's buff, he's honed, he looks fabulous, but he has no private parts. I'm not referring to his distinguishing characteristics, but to a general lack of human personality. Clinton puts together a focus group to find out what he should do; Gore puts together a focus group to find out who he should be. Not only is there no detectable Clinton fatigue, but Clinton himself has been a beneficiary of a premature Gore fatigue. Back when the Monica thing started, I was listening to the gal who runs my general store do her usual riff on the President: he's revolting, he's loathsome, he's contemptible, he's lower than a skunk, etc. "So you want him to resign?" I said, when she paused for breath. "Of course not," she replied. "I don't want Gore in." Clinton's apparently indestructible approval rating has always been, at least in part, a Gore disapproval rating. Al's problem is that he can't connect with soccer moms, waitress moms, New Hampshire general-store moms, or any other demographically desirable moms. But what do I know? According to the country's top political scientists in the Washington Post a few days ago, the election's over and Gore will win with 55-60 per cent of the vote. They've factored in all the factors, and he's a shoo-in. Dream on, boys. I'm no political scientist but, if you multiply the tightness of his pants by the indifference of female voters, Al's got "loser" tattooed across his bottom. Electronic Telegraph, June 2, 2000 ----- Aloha, He'Ping, Om, Shalom, Salaam. Em Hotep, Peace Be, All My Relations. Omnia Bona Bonis, Adieu, Adios, Aloha. Amen. Roads End <A HREF="http://www.ctrl.org/">www.ctrl.org</A> DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. 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