-Caveat Lector-

Seen in Ninas Jokes
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

The Vote
A ballot should be counted as a vote for Al Gore if:

* A hole was punched for Gore.

* A hole was punched for Buchanan, if Buchanan already has his
allocated 337
votes.

* A hole was punched for both Gore and Buchanan.

* A hole was punched for both Gore and David McReynolds, who most
people
didn't even realize was running.

* A hole was punched for Ralph Nader, since the voter would have voted
for
Gore if Nader hadn't bull-headed his way through the election and made
a mess
of everything.

* A 1, 2, or 3-sided flap of paper -- a partial punch, or chad -- is
clinging
to the Gore hole.

* The paper has a very slight indentation on or near the Gore hole, or
maybe
anywhere else on the ballot. (Maybe even a sweat mark. They're not
picky.)

* Someone spilled coffee on the ballot.

* Someone punched a new hole in the ballot right after someone else
threw hot
coffee in the Bush rep's face, momentarily blinding him.

* The ballot was found moldering two days ago in the middle of the
Florida
Everglades.

* The Gore rep, when holding the ballot against his forehead and
concentrating, is left with the indelible impression that the voter
wanted to
vote for Gore, even if he accidentally voted for Bush.

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