-Caveat Lector- http://www.jewishworldreview.com/cols/schlussel.html Jewish World Review Dec. 5, 2000 / 9 Kislev, 5761 Al Gore: the O.J. Simpson of American Politics By Debbie Schlussel I SAW IT COMING. The Second Coming of O.J. In the form of Al Gore. First, part of O.J. Simpson�s legal defense team, His Royal Legal Annoyance Alan Dershowitz, joined Al Gore�s team of legal Hessians down in Florida. I remarked that all we needed was Johnnie Cochran completing the team. But I was wrong. What we needed was O.J. himself, commenting on the White-Ford Bronco like televised Ryder convoy of ballots. And on Thursday, we got it. But there are a lot of OJ-Algore similarities beyond the televised non-Hallmark highway moment. O.J. nullified a jury, getting them to vote him not guilty because of race. Forget all of the evidence against him, all of the witnesses, all of the law. Those nasty detectives, like Mark Fuhrman, were racists who rigged the whole thing against him. Forget the fact that Fuhrman would�ve had to get quarts of OJ�s blood without OJ�s knowledge and plant it in the middle of the night when he was nowhere near the crime scene. Alas, Gore, too, is trying to nullify two juries�those sitting on the courts and those in the court of public opinion. Gore�s doing about as well as OJ in the court of public opinion. Most people know OJ�s guilty. And most people know that Bush is President-elect. They want Gore to concede and go away, just like they wanted OJ to admit it and go away to jail. And like OJ, Gore�s trying to nullify the jurists�the judges deciding the FORTY! or so lawsuits Gore supporters have wrought on America with regard to the election. True, yesterday�s dual US Supreme Court and Leon County Circuit Court(Judge N. Sanders Sauls) Decisions didn�t help this effort, but it�s not yet over. OJ killed a thin lady, and Al Gore may have kidnapped the fat lady. So we can�t hear her singing. In his nullification efforts, Gore�s playing the exact same race cards OJ did -- raising suspicions of rigging -- rigged elections and alleged efforts to keep Blacks from voting � in his desperate attempt to hold on to an election that didn�t go his way. It�s the same shenanigans Cochran, Dershowitz et al used to cast doubt on Fuhrman�s excellent detective work that�s being used to cast doubt on a legitimate election result that�s now held up through multiple litigation after multiple recounts. The same way OJ and Johnnie manipulated gloves that fit -- not to, is the same way the Gore team manipulated legal opinions that didn�t fit and chads that fit quite snugly, into alleged dimpled votes. Most White Americans knew OJ was guilty and most Black Americans supported him. Likewise, most White Americans voted for Bush, know he won, and want Gore to throw in the towel. But 90% of Blacks voted for Gore and are supporting the Gore litigiousness, according to polls. They�re a major component of the thin thread Gore hangs by in his current very precarious legal position. That�s why Jesse Jackson showed up in the courtroom of Judge Nikki Ann Clark, the Black judge who is to decide the Seminole County case, the Democrats� best hope to overturn Bush�s Florida win. He wanted to remind her of something that really doesn�t exist here, just as Johnny Cochran reminded OJ�s mostly Black jury of something that didn�t exist there. He wanted Judge Clark to think this is a civil rights battle. Just like Johnnie Cochran blasphemously invoked the name of Martin Luther King, Jr. and sacrilegiously invoked racism in a murder trial for a man who was no martyr for Blacks or civil rights in his murder of Ron Goldman and Nicole Simpson. Just like Bill Clinton�s lying under oath had nothing to do with civil rights or racism. But he, too, played the race card � the most desperate one in the deck, getting Black White House Counsel Cheryl Mills to lecture the U.S. Senate about a Clinton patriarch�s efforts selling hardware to Blacks from his store. As if that justified lying under oath. As if that justified the murder of two innocent victims. As if that justified stealing a Presidential election. As if race has anything to do with the tea in China � in any of those cases. Yes, Gore has learned well from his boss, Slick Willie, and from the Heisman Hertz rent-a-car flack cum murderer. But in prolonging America�s electoral agony in litigation after litigation when recount after recount didn�t work, Al Gore is giving us all the Heisman. (For you non-football fans, that means he�s dissing us.) �In my case it may have been a little more intriguing,� Simpson proudly remarks, �because people didn�t know what was going to happen. Here they know the ballots are going to get to Tallahassee.� You�d think a murderer who got away with it would keep to himself, but humility was never one of Simpson�s traits. And it�s not Gore�s either. Remember, not only did he invent the Internet, but he�s now invented the Recount, and Dimpled Chad as a vote, too. But Simpson is wrong. In OJ�s case, we already knew he did it. That�s why the desperado fled in the televised traveling Bronco. In Gore�s case, we already know he lost. That�s why the ballots were being schlepped to Tallahassee for a legal battle � another desperado�s last ditch effort. Luckily, so far, most of the important jurists have looked at the law and the evidence�a la Judge Sauls and the U.S. Supremes�and denied Gore. Only the liberal, partisan Florida Supremes have behaved like Judge Itoh (Remember the �Dancing Itohs�?) and O.J.�s ridiculous Playboy-posing, book-writing, racist jury. But unlike in OJ�s case, their decision invented out of wholecloth, was roundly rejected by a higher authority (the U.S. Supremes). There�s one other similarity: Despite everyone knowing that OJ did it, he still manages to get young, single women to date him. No surprise. After all, while married women voted for Bush in droves, Alpha Al got these young, single airheads to go for him, too. And, in the unlikely event that Al gets in, he�ll tax their paycheck to death and do to these single women what OJ does to his girlfriends. Maybe then, they�ll learn their lesson. ----------- JWR contributor Debbie Schlussel is a Detroit-based commentator, attorney, and sports and entertainment agent. While she reads all of her mail, she regrets she cannot respond to each letter. Send your comments to her by clicking here. 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