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Fri 9-Mar-2001
Oshkosh first grader accused of sexually harrassing girls
By Eric Bradley
of the Northwestern
A six-year-old Oshkosh boy was punished because he tried to kiss the girls.
The school calls it sexual harassment. The boy's parents say the claim outrageous.
Derek Dahlke's 6-year-old son, a first-grader at Jefferson Elementary School, had to sit in the school's office for a part of the day Feb. 19 because he was chasing and trying to kiss kindergarten and first-grade girls.
He didn't grab a girl or land a peck, but the action was strong enough for Dahlke to get a telephone call at work and for the school's principal to send a letter home.
"This seems very much like sexual harassment in my opinion," wrote Jefferson principal Rob Becker, in the letter to Dahlke. "Derek has learned that when he threatens kissing, it brings him power. This behavior must stop immediately."
When he first heard the complaint, Dahlke was shocked.
"I couldn't believe it he's 6!" Dahlke said. "Saying it was sexual harassment is incredible."
"When I was a kid, I did the same things, but times have changed," he said. "Unfortunately people are more defensive because of other situations out there."
This was the third time the school formerly addressed the first grader's attempt to kiss girls on the school's playground. Before the letter was sent home, school staff and Becker talked to the boy and told him his actions were wrong and would not be tolerated.
When the girls involved were being chased, they shouted "No," Becker wrote, adding if it happens again the boy will be given an out-of-school suspension.
Although Becker would not talk about the specific situation involving Dahlke's son, he did stand by enforcing the district's zero-tolerance harassment policy to the letter.
"This kind of activity is not acceptable and we're not going to tolerate it," Becker said. "Jefferson should be a happy place, a place where all children should be happy to come to school."
"Schools should be a place children see as safe and hassle-free," he said.
The district's policy, which covers students and staff, states sexual harassment is an unwelcome or unwanted physical contact such as touching, patting, pinching, hugging or brushing against another body. It also covers verbal abuse and the display of graphic or explicit materials.
The first grader was punished, but not for sexual harassment even though that was the description given to his actions by the school principal.
Becker said he hasn't used the school's sexual harassment policy on any students this year. It calls for meetings with parents and students and a written report to the superintendent of schools.
Although the district does not tolerate harassment, it judges the severity of each incident to determine the correct punishment, said John Sprangers, district director of human resources.
Staff determine how often the conduct is happening, the level of aggressiveness involved and if the aggressor uses the action as a source of power over the child who is considered the victim, he said. Finally, it must be determined what definite impact is being made against the recipient of the harassment.
District officials are told every year not to take potentially harassing situations lightly, primarily to protect students but also because the district could be liable, Sprangers said.
Potentially, the Oshkosh district or its employees can be held responsible for the harassment if they are aware of it and do nothing to stop it.
"We have to take these cases seriously, without overreacting of course," Sprangers said. "If a child is interfering with another child's safety at school, we've got to take action."
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