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THE FEDERALIST(r) CHRONICLE
The Conservative e-Journal of Record
* Veritas Vos Liberabit *

22 August 2001
Federalist Edition #01-34
Wednesday Chronicle

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CONTENTS:
The Foundation
Insight
Upright
Editorial Exegesis
Dezinformatsia
Leftovers
Village Idiots
Short Cuts


______----********O********----______
THE FOUNDATION

"The first act of man, when he looked around and saw himself a
creature which he did not make, and a world furnished for his
reception, must have been devotion, and devotion must ever continue
sacred to every individual man, as it appears right to him; and
governments do mischief by interfering." --Thomas Paine


______----********O********----______
INSIGHT

"An informed patriotism is what we want." --Ronald Reagan  {}
"Governments are not formed to achieve, but to protect." --James
Fenimore Cooper  {}  "Mankind are very odd Creatures: One Half censure
what they practice, the other half practice what they censure; the
rest always say and do as they ought."  --Benjamin Franklin  {}
"Faith is the conviction that God knows more than we do about this
life and He will get us through it." --Max Lucado  {}  "Two roads
diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and that has
made all the difference."  --Robert Frost  {}  "Our faith and our
friendships are not shattered by one big act, but by many small
neglects." --J. Gustav White  {}  "When sorrows come, they come not
single spies, But in battalions." --William Shakespeare  {}  "Prayer
is exhaling the spirit of man and inhaling the spirit of God." --Edwin
Keith  {}  "Be still, and in the quiet moments, listen to the voice of
your heavenly Father. His words can renew your spirit. No one knows
you and your needs like He does." --Janet Weaver  {}  "Love gives
itself; it is not bought." --Henry Wadsworth Longfellow  {}
"Christianity must mean everything to us before it can mean anything
to others." --Donald Soper


______----********O********----______
UPRIGHT

"Life gets its meaning, not from self-fulfillment or success or even
heroic existential engagement, but from a personal relationship with
our Creator. And any life dedicated to that pursuit will have more
than 'family values' -- it will have eternal significance." --Charles
Colson  {}  "Freedom is such a precious commodity. Yet sometimes the
freest of people devalue it the most." --Ward Connerly  {}  "The worst
thing in the world that could happen for the Coalition for the
Homeless is for the homeless problem to be wiped out." --Rush Limbaugh
{}  "No event over the past quarter century has had a more profound
impact on the U.S. economy and the prosperity of the 1980s and '90s
than the Reagan tax cut of 1981." --Stephen Moore  {} "Civility in the
first place is a matter of shaping young people's character. The tools
of this art include precepts, examples, exhortation, and shame."
--Charles R. Kesler  {}  "Also in 1973, 28 years and 45 million
abortions ago, our government again used the Constitution to degrade
human life. It gave us Roe v. Wade." --Linda Bowles  {}  "Liberty. It
depends on fighters who understand that just because something is
popular doesn't make it correct. ...We struggle forever on slippery
slopes to preserve what makes us unique as a nation." --Paul M.
Rodriguez  {}  "Every dollar absconded by the burgeoning beast of
government weakens personal freedom and builds the fetters that will
eventually choke the life out of any republic." --Chuck Baldwin  {}
"To diplomats, obfuscation is not a hazard but a duty." --Paul
Greenberg  {}  "Some of today's new language, like cosmetics, conceal
and confuse." --Walter Williams  {}  "...[B]lame, and complicity in
murder, attaches to all those who willfully refuse to recognize the
limits of diplomacy and the duty of active self-defense." --George
Will  {}  "Evil cannot co-exist with good, anymore than sickness and
wellness can. An individual inclines toward good or evil, and so does
a culture." --Cal Thomas  {}  "No, democratic governance and theology
don't consort well: not when governance claims the privilege of making
all the final calls." --Bill Murchison  {}  "Third-party liability is
all the rage in a nation in headlong flight from personal
responsibility and convinced that every ill can be cured by punitive
damages." --Don Feder  {}  "Men are still biting the apple every
chance they get, still blaming the temptress for their fall from
grace." --Kathleen Parker  {}  "No matter how benign his intentions
and regardless of the support he is receiving from some in the
pro-life community, it is difficult to understand how President Bush's
decision will not aid and abet the devaluing of human life and the
robust culture of death that pervades today's society." --David
Limbaugh  {}  "Bush's willingness to spend $250 million of taxpayers'
money for embryonic stem-cell research reflects a statist,
collectivist view of government." --Larry Elder  {}  "One is more
admired for claiming to do good than for proving to be right." --R.
Emmett Tyrrell  {}  "If President Bush really wants to gain the
attention of Hispanic voters, then he should spend less time worrying
about the Mexican economy and more time worrying about our own
economic development." --Nicholas Sanchez  {}  "Maybe history is its
own reward. Those who cherish and study the past for its own sake will
find it full of surprises -- some of them heartbreaking." --Joseph
Sobran  {}  "...[H]istory clearly shows that one of the fastest ways
to undermine the unity of a nation and fan the flames of divisiveness
and chaos is by eroding the bond of a common language." --Mauro
Mujica, chairman of the board and CEO of U.S. English Inc.  {}  "The
combination of U.S. immigration and civil-rights policies is
destroying the equality in law that is the foundation of our
constitutional order." --Paul Craig Roberts  {}  "This is the
justification for totalitarian government. The reasoning is that
government, not individuals, know best." --Diane Alden  {}  "In
avoiding the Star Chamber, America has recreated it: a star chamber of
rules and rights, not privy councillors this time. But despotic
nonetheless."  --Amity Shlaes


______----********O********----______
EDITORIAL EXEGESIS

"In 1990, during the first Bush administration, Adarand Constructors,
a Colorado Springs firm that makes guardrails, submitted the low bid
for a Department of Transportation contract. The job went to another
firm, however, because Adarand was owned by whites, and its rival was
owned by Hispanics. Adarand sued; its case came to the Supreme Court,
which asked the feds to retool their program to demonstrate a
'compelling' government interest; the retooling was done, and approved
by a circuit court, and it will appear, on appeal, before the Supreme
Court once again next term. Now the Justice Department of Bush II has
filed a brief asking the Supremes to let the program stand, so that
'public dollars' will 'not serve to finance the evil of private
prejudice.' What about the stupidity of government prejudice? During
the campaign, George W. Bush said he was against quotas, but for
'affirmative access.' Watch those weasel words; they can protect old
quota programs better than any guardrails Adarand Constructors makes."
--National Review


______----********O********----______
DEZINFORMATSIA

CNN (AKA "Clintonista News Network") is desperately trying to play
catch-up with Fox News, which offers more ideologically balanced
reporting. This week, they are courting Rush Limbaugh as a potential
program host. (Ted Turner is undoubtedly rolling over in his grave --
wait, is he dead?)  {}  From the Commissars of Public Opinion:
"Contributions to the legal defense fund can be made to Andrea Pia
Yates Defense Fund, Horizon Capitol Bank, One City Center 1021 Main
Street, Houston, Texas, 77002.  Any money left over from Andrea's
defense will be given to women's charities dealing with postpartum
depression and psychosis." --Katie Couric avoiding the obvious
question, "Who will decide when there's 'any money left over'?"  {}
"I didn't think it was a good decision because I think in these sorts
of things you do go with what the scientists say within, you know,
certain parameters." --Jonathan Alter on his disappointment with the
Bush decision on stem-cell research funding  {}  This week's "Dan
Rather Sociocrat Media Sycophant" Award: "But even today they could
use that money to pay off the debt rather than spend it on other
programs." --Tim Russert regurgitating the "fiscal responsibility"
line on why the Bush tax cut was not "responsible."  {}  "Fifty
million Frenchmen can't be wrong." --Time magazine's Jack White on a
recent poll showing French disapproval of Bush foreign policy
**Another American Leftist displaying his Europeanness envy!  {}
"Jackson, the charismatic national symbol of human rights...."
--Connie Chung on Jesse Jackson


______----********O********----______
LEFTOVERS

"In a time that we no longer have a Cold War, there is no real threat
to American security.  I think the question is, what is this obsession
that we are seeing that comes out of Washington where we are gearing
up toward a threat that is not there, towards some real fantasy that
is looming?" --"Rev." Al Sharpton on forming an exploratory committee
for a presidential bid in 2004 -- his very own "real fantasy that is
looming."  {}  "We already have a budget, unfortunately, that's doing
that, and that really worries me.  We said at the time the tax cut
passed that we thought that it was too large, too unfocused, and that
it would cause us to go into Social Security and Medicare." --Dick
Gephardt, House Democrite Leader, showing the new "age" card in "Swamp
poker," which Demos hope will trump the "tax cut."  {}  This week's
"Clintonista Presidue" Award: "I just wanted to let you know that here
he is highly appreciated for his support of so many philanthropic
institutions and funds, and that if I can, I would like to make my
recommendation to consider his case." --Former Israeli Prime Minister
Ehud Barak in a conversation with Bill Clinton regarding the Marc Rich
pardon


______----********O********----______
VILLAGE IDIOTS

"The production of human cloned embryos can go ahead within the next
60 days, and implantation will of course come later, after we verify
that the quality of those embryos is viable enough to yield a healthy
pregnancy." --Panos Zavos on CBS's "Face the Nation," with a new
definition for "healthy pregnancy."  {}  "You can most find anything
by going onto Yahoo." --A 16-year old high school student on the
benefit of the Internet for school assignments. **That's why there are
Internet filters!  {}  This week's "Village Marxist" Award: "In
seeking a resolution, we are focusing on how to promote America's
economic interests while fulfilling our WTO obligations." --U.S.
Special Trade Representative Robert B. Zoellick in response to the
European Union claims that the U.S. has violated international trade
law **Uh, Bob.... Didn't you know that can't be done?  {}  From the
"Village Academic Curriculum in Reverse" File: In Seattle, Rebecca
Porcaro, a Rainier Beach High School graduate, won an apology and
$40,000 from Seattle Public Schools after filing discrimination
charges. Porcaro, who is white, was constantly harassed by black
students, with no intervention by the school administration.


______----********O********----______
SHORT CUTS

"The federal government cannot maintain a budget surplus any more than
an alcoholic can leave a fresh bottle of whiskey untouched in the
cupboard." --Rep. Ron Paul  {}  "Animals eat other animals. So long as
they do so, there is no rational justification for human beings not to
eat animals as well. Humanity faces a moral decision: imprison all
predators, or pass the hamburgers." --David Dieteman  {}  "...[A]
teacher who is too ignorant to spell her subject, and too lazy to use
a dictionary, ought to be flipping burgers. Simple burgers, with no
moving parts." --Fred Reed  {}  "Six more surfers in Florida have been
bitten by sharks. One might say that Florida this year has a surfeit
of sharks. By the way, you'll notice that there is not one lawyer
among the shark bite victims. Experts say that's because sharks don't
bite their own." --Lyn Nofziger  {}  "...[D]elivering news you know to
be bogus is a news felony." --Bill O'Reilly  {}  "There's this show on
TV about this enormous fat lady who's always doing specials on things
like Dwarves With Three Heads and the Women Who Love Them Too Much,
which would be at all. But what was scary was the people that came to
watch." --Fred Reed  {}  "This just in: An animal trainer has become
an overnight millionaire. He takes his trained 600-pound gorilla to
retirement homes, where, for a fee, it will twist safety caps off
prescription bottles." --Norman Liebmann  {}  "Gary Condit is what our
soggy therapy culture calls 'a work in progress.' On the other hand,
the work may be finished. The California congressman is interesting
politically not because he's been working without either zipper or
conscience -- the town is full of between-the-sheets artists working
without a net -- but because he's the test of whether Bill Clinton can
be successfully cloned." --Wesley Pruden  {}  "Publicly announcing a
strategy on reshaping a presidential image, even the right strategy,
has two ill effects. It warns the punters to be on their guard against
your advertised manipulation, and it suggests that the president may
be a potted plant moved around the political spectrum at the whim of
others." --John O'Sullivan  {}  "It looks like Al Sharpton is serious
about wanting to be our second black president. He's begun to put
together an exploratory committee. Maybe he can get Tawana Brawley to
head it up." --Lyn Nofziger  {}  "Embryonic stem-cell research? ADA?
Hey, we don't need no stinkin' Constitution." --Larry Elder  {}  "It
often seems that the only people who take L.A. seriously are the press
and the elected officials. Everyone else in this unwieldy sprawl of
ill-defined suburbs is a kind of spectator. Elections are like Dodger
games; people arrive late and leave by the seventh inning." --Rip
Rense  {}  "Jen Crawford has assumed an elevated position on the
governor's staff." --Brian Lee of the Montgomery Journal in a story
about the advancement of Maryland Governor Parris Glendening's rumored
paramour, Ms. Crawford, in his administration.


Night Lines:

Jay Leno.... It was so hot today that Democrats were getting behind Al
Gore just for the shade.  ....  According to the White House, doctors
say that George Bush has the lowest heartbeat ever recorded by someone
in the White House. Well, second lowest -- Dick Cheney got his down to
zero, didn't he?  ....  Bill Clinton says that in his book he will set
the record straight. Well, if there is anyone to set the record
straight, it's Bill Clinton!  ....  Earlier this week Gary Condit
lashed out at his hometown newspaper for calling for him to resign.
Condit should be careful -- he might be the one delivering those
papers in a few years.  ....  Condit does plan to run in 2002. Not for
Congress, but from the law!  ....  Six people in Florida were attacked
by sharks over the weekend. I always use the buddy system when I'm
swimming. I always use a buddy chubbier than I am, to keep the sharks
away from me! Two-thirds of Americans are overweight -- that's good
news for sharks!  ....  Tim Burton says there will not be a sequel to
"Planet of The Apes." I guess he didn't understand the ending either.
...  There is a new firm. If you e-mail them your concern or issue,
they will then send someone to picket the White House in your place.
How lazy has this generation become? How ironic is that - send someone
in your place to protest cloning!  ....  The NAACP had a big meeting
this week. They're still not happy with the roles of minorities in
Hollywood. NBC fought back, though. They said next week in an episode
of "Fear Factor" a black guy will try to drive a car all the way
through Beverly Hills!  ....  According to a new survey, the number
one thing women are looking for in a man? Honesty. That explains why
Clinton and Condit do so well with women.

David Letterman.... Letterman's Top Signs the New York Times Is
Slipping: Instead of "All the News That's Fit to Print," slogan is
"Stuff We Heard From a Guy Who Says His Friend Heard About It."
President does something on the TV show "West Wing," and the next day
it's on the front page.  It's 108 pages, and there's not one single
vowel.  For every story, the accompanying photo is of Tony Danza.
Obituary has become a list of people the editors wish would die.
Notice on sports page: "All scores are approximate." Only ad in job
classifieds: "Wanted: Someone who knows how to put together a
**^#%&@*# newspaper."  For the last two weeks, paper's been edited by
a disoriented Anne Heche.

Argus Hamilton.... The New York Times predicted that Al Gore will face
competition for the 2004 nomination from Tom Daschle, Dick Gephardt,
John Kerry and Joe Lieberman. The debates should  be thrilling with
these five guys. If they were cards, you'd fold.  ....  The Dow Jones
Industrial Average took a dive Friday when jobs cuts combined with bad
profits reports raised fears of a protracted recession. At last, it is
apparent what the W. stands for in George W. Bush. It stands for
Herbert Hoover.  ....  Prince Charles received permission to marry
Camilla Parker-Bowles. He said he will not head the Church of England
when he's king because he has committed adultery. He's got company,
guess who'll never head the Church of Arkansas, either.  ....  Al Gore
headlines an Iowa Democratic dinner next month sporting his new look.
He forgot to shave for a few days during his vacation last month, and
hair began to grow on his face.  The next thing Al Gore knew, he had
invented the beard.  ....  Senator Byron Dorgan of North Dakota urged
the Treasury Department Saturday to ease the ban on U.S. citizens
wanting to travel to Cuba. The current route is  so cumbersome. Every
time an American wants to fly directly to Havana, he has to hide in a
closet with the Miami relatives and wait for Janet Reno to make her
move.  ....  Hillary Clinton told a magazine ... she and Bill Clinton
really enjoy decorating their new homes. She said it's nice to be able
to hang things where they want. It's a warning to George
Stephanopoulous not to drop by any time soon.  ....  Hillary Clinton
co-sponsored an amendment that bans the interstate transport of
roosters for cockfighting. The birds are specially trained to scratch
each other's eyes out. Not everyone can afford to hire James Carville
to do it for them.  ....  USA Today says Democrats are backing off
from gun control measures they once supported in order to take back
the South. Now they're thinking. In a region that has the Ten
Commandments in every classroom, there's no fighting Charlton Heston.


(**) Denotes Editor's Comment

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