NYT Op-Ed Calls For People To Stop Using Toilet Paper
https://www.zerohedge.com/health/nyt-op-ed-calls-people-stop-using-toilet-paper
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/03/opinion/toilet-paper-hoarding-bidets.html?smtyp=cur&smid=tw-nytopinion
The New York Times has published an Op-Ed which shames people into the
'correct' way to clean up after dropping a steamer - arguing that amid an
absurd toilet paper shortage due to coronavirus, people should simply ditch
trees and begin using bidets to strip-mine their crevices.
Panic buying of toilet paper has spread around the globe as rapidly
as the virus, even though there have been no disruptions in supply and the
symptoms of Covid-19 are primarily respiratory, not gastrointestinal. In many
stores, you can still readily find food, but nothing to wipe yourself once it’s
fully digested.
This is all the more puzzling when you consider that toilet paper is
an antiquated technology that infectious disease and colorectal specialists say
is neither efficient nor hygienic. Indeed, it dates back at least as far as the
sixth century, when a Chinese scholar wrote that he “dared not” use paper from
certain classical texts for “toilet purposes.” -NYT
https://books.google.com/books?id=Lx-9mS6Aa4wC&pg=PA123&dq=Needham,+Volume+5,+Part+1+%22toilet+paper%22&hl=en&newbks=1&newbks_redir=0&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiggeOZ4bboAhVgkHIEHbbXBBAQuwUwAHoECAIQCA#v=onepage&q=Needham%2C%20Volume%205%2C%20Part%201%20%22toilet%20paper%22&f=false
The author, Kate Murphy, educates us on the history of ass-wiping,
writing that before TP was readily available for our bungholes, "people used
leaves, seashells, fur pelts and corn cobs," and that "The ancient Greeks and
Romans used small ceramic disks and also sponges on the ends of sticks, which
were then plunged into a bucket of vinegar or salt water for the next person to
use."
This is all according to forensic anthropologist and historical pooping
expert Philippe Charlier, who wrote a 2012 book - "Toilet Hygine in the
Classical Era."
"It's not sexy," said Charlier. "but when you study poo from 2000 B.C.
you can get a lot of information about alimentation, digestion, health,
genetics and migration of populations."
Modern, perforated toilet paper was invented by Seth Wheeler in 1891
according to a patent he took out on the concept.
https://patentimages.storage.googleapis.com/a9/9c/8b/12d8546b8f523b/US459516.pdf
Then we have the invention of the wet wipe - which any modern parent
knows is far superior to toilet paper.
...they are now marketed aggressively to adults with gender specific
brands like Dude-Wipes and Queen V. Sales reached $1.1 billion worldwide last
year, up 35 percent from five years ago, according to Euromonitor
International. The unfortunate result is that the wipes have begun to coalesce
with grease in city sewer systems to form blockages the size of airliners. -NYT
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/shortcuts/2015/apr/22/fatbergs-is-there-one-lurking-in-a-sewer-near-you
The ultimate solution? A bidet.
According to Murphy, "experts agree that rinsing yourself with water is
infinitely more sanitary and environmentally sound."
According to Dr. H. Randolph Bailey, a colorectal surgeon (when he could
have chosen literally any other specialty), said "A lot of people who come to
see me have fairly significant irritation of their bottoms," adding "Most of
the time it has to do with overzealous cleaning."
Bailey added that 'you're just never going to get as clean as rinsing
with water.'
Murphy, meanwhile, shames readers by comparing the rest of the world to
Japan - which has "high-tech toilets capable of cleansing users with precisely
directed temperature-controlled streams of water," we've become bidet-averse.
Blame prudishness and puritanism, at least in part: Bidets, once
ubiquitous in France, became associated with hedonism and licentiousness. Marie
Antoinette had a red-trimmed bidet in her prison cell while awaiting the
guillotine. And during World War II, American soldiers first saw bidets in
French brothels, which made them think they were naughty. An often-told joke
was that a wealthy American tourist in Paris assumed the bidet in her hotel
room was for washing babies in, until the maid told her, “No, madame, this is
to wash the babies out.”
http://en.muvs.org/topic/the-bidet-is-for-vaginal-rinsing/
But even in France, toilet paper has taken over. “Now, when
constructing a new flat, nobody puts a bidet in it,” Dr. Charlier said.
“There’s not room for it, particularly in Paris.” Although, when the bidet is
incorporated in the toilet, as modern versions are, space is a nonissue. “Maybe
there are also psychological reasons we do not embrace the newer technology,”
he said. -NYT
So - with toilet paper flying off the shelves amid the coronavirus
pandemic, is it time to start freshening up with a targeted blast of H20?
