> helpful to describe that judgement as tending to pick the product of > the usefulness and the difficulty, and making decisions when emotional > memory bounds are tighter.
errata: this would the product of the usefulness and ease, or the quotient of the usefulness over the difficulty; becomes apparent if considered. note: i've found that at different times my inner procsses can seem described by different heuristics, based on what influences are most intense. usefulness * ease seems to make sense when confused and determined, especially under pressure such as a time limit. > That is, maybe, my mind will pick the part that looks clearer and less > difficult, when taxed. > > "You will never be able to understand", held alone, is clearer than > "the less you will ... [something confusing involving the word > "understand"]", and both have the same initial expectation of i am still irritated that somebody made this dangerous expression ever. it seems like it has some kind of rudeness underneath it. > expressing difficulty understanding things. My mind seems to try to > handle the confusion by relying on the presence of the illogical > internal phrase that makes more sense when held alone. when i originally planned to add to these notes, i meant to make a small concise addition, not a long-winded one. > Summary: emotional memory, paired with subconscious choices to > consider things that are more useful when taxed, can produce > experiences that seem exotically bizarre and terrifying, when for me > they seem mostly ways to avoid flashbacks that stimulate more relevant > terror. > > Note: maybe show this to a therapist, even one I don't trust, seems > really helpful. Comment: i could use more time thinking about this > without real-time challenge, so as to be prepared for questions and > new ideas better. >
