The Hardcore View
Trial of the Decade, Day Two
Well, things are certainly heating up in Division 44 of the county
courthouse, under the thoughtful watch of the honorable Michael Kellogg. I
can feel the heat because today for the first time the two lead
investigators for the Organized Crime and Vice division, Pornography Unit
appeared. (Yes, they have one.) Detectives Steven Takaeshita and Kyle
Lewiston, came to court this morning dressed in detective clothes and shiny
shoes with a BIG box full of papers and dirty movies. This here grim
building behind me is the courthouse building downtown on Temple Street.
They must feel that it's important to show up because it means they have to
pull themselves away from the critical duty of watching porno movies all
day long to see if they can detect any obscenities occurring. Then again,
this is the first time in some 15 years they have the chance to do this, so
I'm sure they're excited about it.
Today was day two of the Jury Selection process. This is critical to my
defense because I certainly wouldn't want any ultra-conservatives on the
jury who feel that all pornography is harmful. So we are giving all the
potential jurors a 12 page questionnaire to fill out. It has such questions
as: "Do you think Max Hardcore is guilty because he has been charged? Have
you now or have you ever watched a pornographic movie and pulled your pud?
Do you think that pornography will cause the downfall of civilization?" All
good stuff to know about someone if we expect them to render a fair and
impartial decision after watching hours of modern hardcore porno.
Today the city was able to muster up around 47 potential jurors, but about
8 were dismissed due to the fact that they felt they would suffer permanent
brain damage or the loss of their soul if they would be forced to watch
porn movies. I know that I sometimes come off as an uncaring individual,
but I draw the line at causing someone to lose their soul.
Judge Kellogg then introduced me, my lawyer Jeffery Douglas, and the
prosecutor Michelle Anderson to the jury, and we said good morning and they
all said good morning back. That's the kind of casual courtroom Judge
Kellogg runs. Hey, he even wears cowboy boots and jeans under his robe.
He's a pretty fair and funny guy and I'm lucky to have him instead of a
judge like Larry Flynt had in his movie, The People Vs. Larry Flynt.
Then Judge Kellogg got down to serious business, and gave the jury
instructions on the law and their conduct, and read the charges against me,
and all the potential jurors listened very intently and tried hard not to
fall asleep.
We are also trying to introduce "comparables" for the jury to look at.
These are other pornographic movies made by other companies that are
similar to the one I'm on trial for, Max Extreme Volume 4. We've asked for
and promptly received tapes and sales records from several companies like
Legend and Zane who were very cool about things and my hat is off to them
for their cooperation.
But when we asked for a couple of movies and sales records from Extreme,
they told us to go fuck ourselves for some reason. Probably they were just
having a bad day, but maybe they don't realize that by helping me they
could be helping themselves. Whatever.
This trial is shaping up to be a real dogfight. And I intend to do my best
to get those pups back in the kennel where they belong. I'll be sure and
keep you all posted on how it develops over the next few weeks we expect it
to run. If any of you upstanding citizens would like to contribute to my
defense, it would be graciously accepted and greatly appreciated.
http://www.avninsider.com/stories/max092002.shtml
Be sure and check out my website at www.MaxHardcore.com www.MaxHardcore.com
for complete details and some really fine filth! Or you can email me at
[EMAIL PROTECTED] I've got to run now because I've still got like six
bucks in my pocket so I'm off to see a Dodgers game and take my mind off
this nonsense.
-Max Hardcore
