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A teacher said to her class:"Who was the first man?"George Washington," a little boy shouted promptly."How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?" asked the teacher, smiling indulgently."Because, " said the little boy, "he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen."But at this point a larger boy held up his hand."Well," said the teacher to him, "who do you think was the first man?""I don't know what his name was," said the larger boy, "but I know it wasn't George Washington, ma'am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him."
One day a boy came to his teacher and said:" Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig.""I certainly do," said the teacher, "and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me."Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.Finally the teacher said to the boy:"I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig.""Yes," said the boy, "he did intend to, but the pig sot well."
A man and a woman walk into a very posh Rodeo Drive store. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the owner discreetly whispers to the man, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for $65,000." "No problem! I'll write you a check!" "Very good, sir." says the shop owner. "Today is Saturday. You may come by on Monday to pick it up, after the check has cleared." So the man and the woman leave. On Monday, the fellow returns. The store owner is outraged, "How dare you show your face in here?! There wasn't a single penny in your checking account!!""I just had to come by," grinned the guy, "to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!"
An American attorney had just finished a guest lecture at a law school in Italy when an Italian lawyer approached him and asked, "Is it true that a person can fall down on a sidewalk in your county and then sue the landowners for lots of money?" Told that it was true, the lawyer turned to his partner and started speaking rapidly in Italian. When they stopped, the American attorney asked if they wanted to go to America to practice law. "No, no," one replied. "We want to go to America and fall down on sidewalks."
zyasui0chairo92inaooshi,zuruzuru urasenke.
One day a boy came to his teacher and said:" Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig.""I certainly do," said the teacher, "and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me."Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.Finally the teacher said to the boy:"I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig.""Yes," said the boy, "he did intend to, but the pig sot well."
A man and a woman walk into a very posh Rodeo Drive store. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the owner discreetly whispers to the man, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for $65,000." "No problem! I'll write you a check!" "Very good, sir." says the shop owner. "Today is Saturday. You may come by on Monday to pick it up, after the check has cleared." So the man and the woman leave. On Monday, the fellow returns. The store owner is outraged, "How dare you show your face in here?! There wasn't a single penny in your checking account!!""I just had to come by," grinned the guy, "to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!"
An American attorney had just finished a guest lecture at a law school in Italy when an Italian lawyer approached him and asked, "Is it true that a person can fall down on a sidewalk in your county and then sue the landowners for lots of money?" Told that it was true, the lawyer turned to his partner and started speaking rapidly in Italian. When they stopped, the American attorney asked if they wanted to go to America to practice law. "No, no," one replied. "We want to go to America and fall down on sidewalks."
zyasui0chairo92inaooshi,zuruzuru urasenke.
