Hello Sean, Thank you for share the letter with us all and I will keep you in my prayer. God have an purpose for you as long you have the faith in him. Addison
O. Addison Gethers e-mail address : [email protected] or [email protected] window live messenger: [email protected] aim: durangoadd64 skype: cowboys62 yahoo messenger: OADDISONGETHERS ----- Original Message ----- From: Sean Ray To: Undisclosed-Recipient:; Sent: Monday, May 04, 2009 5:52 PM Subject: {dbilg} Please pray with me about this? Here is the letter I wrote to my rehab counselor with name omitted. I went to Oregon Advocacy and they did call me and took down my information. They did get my statement concerning this. Also, this morning I wrote a letter to my rehab counselor. Here is the letter so that you know what I've said in it. I tried hard to be professional, but at the same time, I wanted her to know how I felt with all that's gone on so far. Prayers and feedback are welcome. I'm believing the Lord for My victory. Blessings, Sean----- Original Message ----- FromMay 04, 2009 7:39 AM Subject: Urgent. Needs attention. Dear ____, As you can probably guess, the internship suddenly is not going so well. Well... Actually it isn't so suddenly. I will share with you the turn of events. I will try to be brief but clear. First, I was talked to three times about confidentiality. I had signed papers concerning confidentiality. the papers and the talk with Pat were no big deal. However, I found the last talk about Religion, politics, and confidentiality that Winslow gave me to be intimidating and a bit insulting as I've have done prior internships and volunteering in agencies dealing with confidentiality. He focused on not talking about religion that I felt oppressed. I understood the not talking about religion. all anyone had to say is that there is no talk of religion. this is a state agency and we can't have that here. fine! that would have been done. He made it sound as if I couldn't say, "thank God." IN fact in a conversation I had said to him, "I hope... I pray," and he said, "that's what I'm talking about. You can't be saying that stuff here when you're teaching." I felt like I'd better watch my P's and Q's if I didn't want to be terminated from the internship. Later, I was to find out how right I was. I confronted Winslow about his stern talk and said how it made me feel anxious and he told me that it was the desired effect he wanted and that his talk worked. I don't really need that. it doesn't take a sledge hammer to teach me a lesson and that's what I feel was happening. Once we got started, HE would ask me if I knew this, that, or the other thing to which I'd answer, "no." I never used Jaws 5, for example. I wouldn't know how to compare version 5 with version 10. I would have been willing to learn the difference. I also didn't realize that there were all kinds of hotkeys in the internet working with Jaws that I could use. I saw someone teaching that to a student and began to feel like I really needed more training before getting into an internship. I began to feel uncertain and wanted to have more learning experiences for these advanced things. I know I can do it but I needed more of a training basis. I was told that this was a time of learning for me and I was gaining experience, etc. I thought Great, that's wonderful. I had a couple of lessons with students and thought I had struck up a rapport with them. One student, I did but I was to find out later that another student didn't want me as an instructor. I thought the lesson had went well,. I was surprised to find that the student didn't want to stay with me. This was after the incident that I'm going to write to you about. I'm really upset about this next incident that took place. I felt deceived, angry, and I thought the situation was handled poorly. first of all, my professionalism has never been challenged. Second, I have always thought that when one is waiting for the bus/Tri-Met Lift, we were on our own time. Lastly, nobody else's actions but my own should reflect on my professionalism. That said, I will tell you the incident. I had gone into the internship on a Thursday. I didn't have a student. We all talked and I thought it was a positive thing. I had been dismissed for the day. so, I figured that this was my own time. I was not still on the clock, as it were. I went back and met Todd who was in the student lounge. He had brought Gandalf with him. The day before, I had talked to Ruth about Gandalf, my resident feather picker. I told her how he was my favorite dove. I have seen in many agencies where the husband picks up the wife and has one of the family pets with him. We took Gandalf back there, in his carrier, in his flight suit and when we were holding him, he was on a leash. he was very controlled. he was not flying all over the place. Everyone was admiring him except Winslow. I just chocked it up to him not really being comfortable with animals. we were there for all of two to five minutes. I made a point of not staying long. I thought everything was fine. I was not corrected nor disciplined at that moment, and if I had been corrected and told to remove Gandalf from the place, I certainly would without question. I figured that everything was okay. it was not. the following Tuesday, I came in and was informed that I had a scheduled appointment with both he and Pat at 9:15. some other bad things had already happened to me the day be fore so I had been feeling upset but just ignoring it so I could be professional. Well, after being informed of the meeting, I began to feel anxious and told Winslow. I Went in and sat down and was totally surprised at the reasons for the meeting. First, I was totally surprised to find that the incident of the bird coming into the tech room would be grounds for termination without discussion. I had begged for my position back. I was told that they'd talk about it. The other incident was the fact that I had "bare feet on top of my dog." I was told that this was living room behavior. I was thinking in the back of my mind, "Hey! wait a minute, I don't just take off my shoes in the middle of any office." then I remembered wearing dress shoes that hurt my feet so badly. I was diagnosed with Plantarfaceitis and without proper support for my feet, I have pain in my feet. It was either take my shoes off briefly or have such painful feet that I wouldn't be able to walk with River safely. I wasn't just practicing living room behavior. You will see my other letter that I wrote to Pat and Winslow. We need to talk. This internship is not working out and I know that Winslow has to do a report and the report will determine whether or not I am funded for my education as a computer instructor. None of what happened in there has any baring on how I teach or don't teach. I feel so anxious that I really don't think I can continue my internship, which by the way got cut down to two weeks. If I weren't taking feverfew, I would have woke up with a migraine due to all the anxiety and upset this has caused. My professionalism has never been in question like this. I still want to continue my education in spite of Winslow's report that will say I lack professionalism. I don't feel comfortable going back into a situation where I feel that any little mistake could be called into question and grounds for termination. The only other job where I've had that was at LiveBridge and I had a lot of headaches there if you recall. I had to quit that job due to headaches. I didn't know they were migraines at the time. I'm not going to play around with my health now. If I must be in an internship, then I'd like to work under the supervision of someone else other than Winslow. All my other volunteer placements and internship experiences have been positive where if I did make a mistake, I was corrected and could learn from it. this other way is stressful for me. I feel I was not dealt with properly. the action taken was harsh. I had asked about a handbook for the intern. there should be one stating policies. Instead, when I talked about professionalism and conversed a little more about the bird incident, I was told that there was an unwritten code of professionalism that people needed to follow. I had seen in several different companies where animals were brought into their job site. We need to deal with this. I'm thinking about not coming back. I have taught computer for two years at ILR and if I made a mistake, I was told about it and we went on with life. That is confidence building. this internship, (testernship,) is not confidence building. I had the feeling of never really being able to measure up. I want to learn in a situation that will be relaxed. One can't learn if they are tight and feeling they have to watch their every little move. This is not okay. I'm having the butterfly tummy now just thinking about going back in there Wednesday. the better way to have done all of this was to first do the training where ever it was to be done and then have the internship. I feel like I would have been more ready. this other way is a shambles. I don't feel that this is a fair assessment of my abilities at all. Please let's come up with a plan before Wednesday? this is not okay. You should know that I feel so strongly about the treatment and actions taken that I am considering going to CAP with this. No one should ever have to go through what I went through. I could understand that bringing a bird isn't okay, but it's not worth termination without warning. No one needs to be intimidated into keeping things confidential, and no one needs to feel that they must suppress all their beliefs. I'm not telling other people how to pray, but If I want to say, "Thank God," like so many others, then I should be able to do this. I don't need this. I want to start training and forget about Winslow's negative report, the harsh criticism, judgment and actions, and just go on with my education. I've never had to do a testernship before trying to go to college to find out if I can do it. This is insane! Please let's do something about this. thanks. Sincerely, Sean Ray --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Deaf-Blind Inspirational Life Group" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/DBILG?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
