--- Begin Message ---
Package: wims
Version: 4.03a
Severity: wishlist
Tags: patch
Dear Maintainer,
The package descriptions for WIMS contain rather a lot of typos and
other language errors, especially considering that the target audience
for these packages includes English teachers.
> Package: wims
[...]
> Description: server for educative contents as courses, exercises, exams
* "Educative" isn't quite the right word (maybe "educational"?);
* "contents" should be "content" (the non-count-noun sense);
* "as" should be "such as";
* the list needs a conjunction;
* or better yet, leave that list for the long description.
> WIMS is an acronym for WWW Interactive Mathematics Server. Nowadays
> WIMS serves much more than mathematic contents (physics, chemistry,
> biology, languages).
* Pedantically speaking, s/acronym/initialism/;
* "nowadays" is a slightly odd choice of word;
* "serves" should be something like "can serve" or "supports";
* "mathematic" should be "mathematical";
* again, "contents" should be "content";
* the parenthetical list again needs a conjunction.
Or since upstream now seems to expand the initialism as "Web
Interactive Multipurpose Server", why not just start from there?
> .
> The WIMS educational platform features a rich set of resources and
> exercises either with free access or for personalised study.
* "with" is probably the wrong preposition;
* "free" (what, no fee?) should probably be something like "open";
* "personalised" is en_GB; we're standardising on en_US;
* but in fact maybe "individual" would be a better word?
> .
The following list comes out of nowhere. Is it meant to follow on
from the above (making it a list of the kind of resources that the
WIMS platform features)? If so, the previous line should end in a
colon (otherwise, the next should start with a capital letter).
> * exercises with automatic feedback and correction, which allow the
> learners to work at their own pace;
It's not clear what the subject of "allow" is - the exercises or the
feedback and correction? Saying "allowing" would make the ambiguity
less obtrusive.
> * interactive exercices with randomly assigned data, which allow
> the learners to work on the same type of exercise but with
> different data and as often as they wish;
* Recurring typo: s/exercice/exercise/;
* again, is it the exercises that allow this?
* a slight reshuffle would make it more natural.
> * exercises with an automatic scoring system, which enhances learner
> motivation;
> * user-friendly graphics and calculation tools;
(I've got no complaints about these.)
> * courses and documents with hyperlinks to the exercise pool, and also
> eventually randomly built parts to exemplify theories
* "And also" doesn't really fit;
* "eventually" looks like an error for "possibly/optionally";
* what does "randomly built parts to exemplify theories" mean?
* missing final semicolon.
> * support for exams with pre-published contents. As each individual exam
> will have randomly chosen data, training is possible but writing each
> response in advance is not.
> .
> This package contains the WIMS fast CGI server, serving OEF documents.
> OEF is the acromym for "Open Exercise Format", a very high-level language
> which allow authors to focus on pedagogical issues.
* Another typo: s/acromym/acronym/ (but don't call it that);
* use the full version of OEF the first time, then the abbreviation;
* "fast CGI" should be "FastCGI";
* syntax error: it "allows" this.
>
> Package: wims-java-applets
> Architecture: alpha amd64 armel i386 ia64 mips mipsel powerpc s390 sparc
> Depends: ${misc:Depends}
> Description: applets for modules used by the WIMS server
* Optional stylistic issue: based this synopsis on the one for wims;
* pedantically, "WIMS server" is a "PIN number-ism".
> Wims' modules implement every user interface beyond its main page,
> the non exhaustive list of the features is: administrative tasks, help,
> and a few interactive exercises, mathematic tools, libraries ...
* Where it means the suite as a whole, "Wims" should be "WIMS";
* the normal idiomatic possessive of WIMS would be WIMS's;
* but it probably doesn't need to be a possessive anyway;
* "WIMS uses modules to implement [...]" would be clearer;
* the second line is a "run-on" sentence;
* "non exhaustive" needs a hyphen;
* but it's clunky anyway - just say "including";
* yet another conjunction shortage;
* it would read better if the most complex item was last.
> .
> This package does not contain the thousands of exercices which are
> partly provided by the optional package wims-extra.
* Recurring typo: s/exercice/exercise/;
* what exercises do you mean, if they aren't all anywhere?
* there is no package wims-extra!
* there's no need to say both that this package doesn't contain them
and that another package provides them;
* okay, that's what this package isn't. But what is it?
> .
> Other educational contents can be downloaded outside of the Debian
> system by automated updates. See http://www.wimsedu.info
* Again "contents" is wrong, but here "materials" might fit better;
* it appears to be plain wimsedu.info, with no "www.";
* I don't see anything obvious there about automated updates;
* why is this information here and not in the description for wims?
> Package: wims-modules
> Architecture: all
> Depends: ${misc:Depends}
> Description: modules used by the WIMS server
> Wims' modules implement every user interface beyond its main page,
> the non exhaustive list of the features is: administrative tasks, help,
> and a few interactive exercises, mathematic tools, libraries ...
> .
> This package does not contain the thousands of exercices which are
> partly provided by the optional package wims-extra.
> .
> Other educational contents can be downloaded outside of the Debian
> system by automated updates. See http://www.wimsedu.info
Ditto, ditto, ditto. The package wims Depends: on this and only
Recommends: wims-java-applets, but there's no clue here as to what
would happen if I only installed the modules and not the applets.
> Package: flydraw
> Section: graphics
> Architecture: any
> Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends},
> imagemagick (>= 4:5.4.4.5-1)|graphicsmagick-imagemagick-compat
> Description: Inline drawing tool
No need for initial capitalisation. But what does "inline" mean in
this context? The long description goes on to imply that the answer
is "parsing commands from STDIN" - an obscure analogy with things
like "inline assemblers", except that these commands aren't being
embedded inline in anything else. I might suggest calling it an
"instruction-driven drawing tool", but I don't know enough about it to
be sure.
> flydraw is an inline drawing tool, which uses libgd to output PNG, JPG,
> GIF files. It parses its standard input for drawing commands.
* Another missing conjunction;
* the files with the common extension .jpg are in JPEG format;
* end users are surely more likely to care about its basic gimmick
of reading instructions from STDIN than about what library it
uses, so reorder it to put that first;
* also, what if anything has this got to do with WIMS?
Some of my proposed fixes might need further work depending on the
answers to my questions, but here's my best guess:
| Package: wims
[...]
| Description: server for educational content
| The Web Interactive Multipurpose Server is an educational platform first
| developed for courses, exercises, and exams in mathematics, and since
| extended for subjects such as physics, chemistry, biology, and languages.
| It features a rich set of resources and exercises either for open access
| or individual study:
| * exercises with automatic feedback and correction, allowing learners to
| work at their own pace;
| * interactive exercises with randomly assigned data, allowing learners to
| work as often as desired on the same type of exercise with different data;
| * exercises with an automatic scoring system, which enhances learner
| motivation;
| * user-friendly graphics and calculation tools;
| * courses and documents with hyperlinks to the exercise pool, with the
| option of randomly built parts to exemplify theories;
| * support for exams with pre-published contents. As each individual exam
| will have randomly chosen data, training is possible but writing each
| response in advance is not.
| * extra exercises are provided by the optional package wims-extra-all, and
| further material can be downloaded outside of the Debian system by
| automated updates (see http://wimsedu.info).
| .
| This package provides the WIMS FastCGI server, serving documents in Open
| Exercise Format. OEF is a very high-level language which allows authors to
| focus on pedagogical issues.
|
| Package: wims-java-applets
[...]
| Description: server for educational content - applets for modules
| WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
| including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
| a few interactive exercises.
| .
| This package provides Java applets for WIMS modules.
|
| Package: wims-modules
[...]
| Description: server for educational content - modules
| WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
| including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
| a few interactive exercises.
| .
| This package provides the WIMS modules.
|
| Package: flydraw
[...]
| Description: inline drawing tool
| This package provides a drawing tool which reads instructions from
| standard input, and uses libgd to output PNG, JPEG, or GIF files.
--
JBR
Ankh kak! (Ancient Egyptian blessing)
Source: wims
Section: web
Priority: optional
Maintainer: Georges Khaznadar <[email protected]>
Build-Depends: quilt, debhelper (>= 7.4.19), texlive-base, po-debconf,
libgd2-xpm-dev|libgd2-noxpm-dev, autoconf2.59|autoconf, automake1.9|automake,
openjdk-6-jdk [alpha amd64 armel i386 ia64 mips mipsel powerpc s390 sparc],
ant [alpha amd64 armel i386 ia64 mips mipsel powerpc s390 sparc]
Standards-Version: 3.9.3
Package: wims
Architecture: any
Pre-Depends: adduser
Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends},
imagemagick (>= 4:5.4.4.5-1)|graphicsmagick-imagemagick-compat,
pari-gp, gnuplot, maxima (>=5.26.0), maxima-share,
octave3.0|octave, fortunes,
texlive-base, texlive-latex-base, texlive-fonts-recommended,
mailutils| mailx, units-filter (>=3.5), chemeq (>=2.7), graphviz,
libjs-prototype, libjs-mootools, ldap-utils,
apache2|apache, wims-modules (>=4.01c)
Recommends: yacas, gap, wims-help, wims-java-applets
Suggests: wims-extra-all|wims-extra
Conflicts: wims-common (<<3.55), libwims (<<3.55), wims-modules-fr (<<3.55),
wims-extra(<<3.62-4), wims-modules-es(<<3.62-4)
Replaces: wims-common (<<3.55), libwims (<<3.55), wims-modules-fr (<<3.55),
wims-modules-es(<<3.62-4)
Provides: wims-modules-fr, wims-modules-es
Description: server for educational content
The Web Interactive Multipurpose Server is an educational platform first
developed for courses, exercises, and exams in mathematics, and since
extended for subjects such as physics, chemistry, biology, and languages.
It features a rich set of resources and exercises either for open access
or individual study:
* exercises with automatic feedback and correction, allowing learners to
work at their own pace;
* interactive exercises with randomly assigned data, allowing learners to
work as often as desired on the same type of exercise with different data;
* exercises with an automatic scoring system, which enhances learner
motivation;
* user-friendly graphics and calculation tools;
* courses and documents with hyperlinks to the exercise pool, with the
option of randomly built parts to exemplify theories;
* support for exams with pre-published contents. As each individual exam
will have randomly chosen data, training is possible but writing each
response in advance is not.
* extra exercises are provided by the optional package wims-extra-all, and
further material can be downloaded outside of the Debian system by
automated updates (see http://wimsedu.info).
.
This package provides the WIMS FastCGI server, serving documents in Open
Exercise Format. OEF is a very high-level language which allows authors to
focus on pedagogical issues.
Package: wims-java-applets
Architecture: alpha amd64 armel i386 ia64 mips mipsel powerpc s390 sparc
Depends: ${misc:Depends}
Description: server for educational content - applets for modules
WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
a few interactive exercises.
.
This package provides Java applets for WIMS modules.
Package: wims-modules
Architecture: all
Depends: ${misc:Depends}
Description: server for educational content - modules
WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
a few interactive exercises.
.
This package provides the WIMS modules.
Package: flydraw
Section: graphics
Architecture: any
Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends},
imagemagick (>= 4:5.4.4.5-1)|graphicsmagick-imagemagick-compat
Description: inline drawing tool
This package provides a drawing tool which reads instructions from
standard input, and uses libgd to output PNG, JPEG, or GIF files.
diff -ru wims-4.03a.pristine/debian/control wims-4.03a/debian/control
--- wims-4.03a.pristine/debian/control 2012-06-12 21:19:55.000000000 +0100
+++ wims-4.03a/debian/control 2012-06-24 01:37:23.599392173 +0100
@@ -26,66 +26,57 @@
Replaces: wims-common (<<3.55), libwims (<<3.55), wims-modules-fr (<<3.55),
wims-modules-es(<<3.62-4)
Provides: wims-modules-fr, wims-modules-es
-Description: server for educative contents as courses, exercises, exams
- WIMS is an acronym for WWW Interactive Mathematics Server. Nowadays
- WIMS serves much more than mathematic contents (physics, chemistry,
- biology, languages).
- .
- The WIMS educational platform features a rich set of resources and
- exercises either with free access or for personalised study.
- .
- * exercises with automatic feedback and correction, which allow the
- learners to work at their own pace;
- * interactive exercices with randomly assigned data, which allow
- the learners to work on the same type of exercise but with
- different data and as often as they wish;
+Description: server for educational content
+ The Web Interactive Multipurpose Server is an educational platform first
+ developed for courses, exercises, and exams in mathematics, and since
+ extended for subjects such as physics, chemistry, biology, and languages.
+ It features a rich set of resources and exercises either for open access
+ or individual study:
+ * exercises with automatic feedback and correction, allowing learners to
+ work at their own pace;
+ * interactive exercises with randomly assigned data, allowing learners to
+ work as often as desired on the same type of exercise with different data;
* exercises with an automatic scoring system, which enhances learner
motivation;
* user-friendly graphics and calculation tools;
- * courses and documents with hyperlinks to the exercise pool, and also
- eventually randomly built parts to exemplify theories
+ * courses and documents with hyperlinks to the exercise pool, with the
+ option of randomly built parts to exemplify theories;
* support for exams with pre-published contents. As each individual exam
will have randomly chosen data, training is possible but writing each
response in advance is not.
- .
- This package contains the WIMS fast CGI server, serving OEF documents.
- OEF is the acromym for "Open Exercise Format", a very high-level language
- which allow authors to focus on pedagogical issues.
+ * extra exercises are provided by the optional package wims-extra-all, and
+ further material can be downloaded outside of the Debian system by
+ automated updates (see http://wimsedu.info).
+ .
+ This package provides the WIMS FastCGI server, serving documents in Open
+ Exercise Format. OEF is a very high-level language which allows authors to
+ focus on pedagogical issues.
Package: wims-java-applets
Architecture: alpha amd64 armel i386 ia64 mips mipsel powerpc s390 sparc
Depends: ${misc:Depends}
-Description: applets for modules used by the WIMS server
- Wims' modules implement every user interface beyond its main page,
- the non exhaustive list of the features is: administrative tasks, help,
- and a few interactive exercises, mathematic tools, libraries ...
+Description: server for educational content - applets for modules
+ WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
+ including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
+ a few interactive exercises.
.
- This package does not contain the thousands of exercices which are
- partly provided by the optional package wims-extra.
- .
- Other educational contents can be downloaded outside of the Debian
- system by automated updates. See http://www.wimsedu.info
+ This package provides Java applets for WIMS modules.
Package: wims-modules
Architecture: all
Depends: ${misc:Depends}
-Description: modules used by the WIMS server
- Wims' modules implement every user interface beyond its main page,
- the non exhaustive list of the features is: administrative tasks, help,
- and a few interactive exercises, mathematic tools, libraries ...
- .
- This package does not contain the thousands of exercices which are
- partly provided by the optional package wims-extra.
+Description: server for educational content - modules
+ WIMS uses modules to implement every user interface beyond its main page,
+ including administrative tasks, help, mathematical tools, libraries, and
+ a few interactive exercises.
.
- Other educational contents can be downloaded outside of the Debian
- system by automated updates. See http://www.wimsedu.info
+ This package provides the WIMS modules.
Package: flydraw
Section: graphics
Architecture: any
Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends},
imagemagick (>= 4:5.4.4.5-1)|graphicsmagick-imagemagick-compat
-Description: Inline drawing tool
- flydraw is an inline drawing tool, which uses libgd to output PNG, JPG,
- GIF files. It parses its standard input for drawing commands.
-
+Description: inline drawing tool
+ This package provides a drawing tool which reads instructions from
+ standard input, and uses libgd to output PNG, JPEG, or GIF files.
--- End Message ---
