*"Something About Wives"*

*My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.* *
-Henny Youngman
----------------------------------------------------------

**My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we**
met.
-Rodney Dangerfield**
-----------------------------------------------------------

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's
wrong.
-Milton Berle
------------------------------------------------------------

**I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,**
"There was
water in the carburetor."
I asked her, "Where's the car?"
She replied, In the lake."
-Henny Youngman**
--------------------------------------------------------------

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-Henny Youngman
-----------------------------------------------------------------

**After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You**
know, I
was a fool when I married you."
The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and

didn't notice."* *
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

When a man steals your wife, there is no better
revenge than
to let him keep her.
---------------------------------------------------------------

**I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't**
like to
interrupt her.**
----------------------------------------------------------

**My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.**
So I
got myself two girlfriends. **
---------------------------------------------------------

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided
not to
report it since the thief was spending much less than
his wife did.
-------------------------------------------------------

**Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is**
finished.**
----------------------------------------------------------

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does
it cost
to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still
paying."
---------------------------------------------------------- *
*


**Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of **
Africa, a
Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son. **
---------------------------------------------------------

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real

happiness was until I got married; then it was too
late.
----------------------------------------------------------

**A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."**
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
**--------------------------------------------------------**

A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a
millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" asked the
friend.
"A billionaire." she replied,
----------------------------------------------------------

**Marriage is the triumph of imagination over **
intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over
experience. **
----------------------------------------------------------

It's not true that married men live longer than single
men.
It only seems longer.
----------------------------------------------------------

**Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was* *
almost
impossible. **
------------------------------------------------------

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go
through
life Thinking they had no faults at all.
----------------
-----------------------------------------
**A successful man is one who makes more money than his**
wife
can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such
a man.**
----------------------------------------------------------

A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask
for
whatever he wants,
but his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets.
The man thinks for a moment and says, Okay, give me a
million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead."
---------------------------------------------------------

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for
marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
----------------------------------------------------------

The most effective way to remember your wife's
birthday is
to forget it once.
*

-- 
Usmani
[email protected]
mobile@ 050-8483748

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