INVESTMENTS ------------ STOCK: A magical piece of paper that is worth $33.75 until the moment you buy it. It will then be worth $8.50. BOND: What you had with your spouse until you pawned his/her golf clubs to invest in Amazon.com. BROKER: The person you trust to help you make major financial decisions. Please note the first five letters of this word spell "Broke". BROKER: Def 2: What you are after your Broker entices you to buy that new stock. BEAR: What your trade account and wallet will be when you take a flyer on that hot stock tip your secretary gave you. BULL: What your broker uses to explain why your mutual funds tanked during the last quarter. MARGIN: Where you scribble the latest quotes when you're supposed to be listening to your manager's presentation. SHORT POSITION: A type of trade where, in theory, a person sells stocks he doesn't actually own. Since this also only ever works in theory, a short position is what a person usually ends up being in (i.e. "The rent, sir? Hahaha, well, I'm a little short this month."). COMMISSION: The only reliable way to make money on the stock market, which is why your broker charges you one. YAK: What you do into a pail when you discover your stocks have plunged and your broker is making a margin call. **************************** Kind regards, [EMAIL PROTECTED] http://www.gold-today.com Sign up with e-gold today and get grams of e-gold here. https://www.e-gold.com/newacct/newaccount.asp?cid=129542 subscribe to the gold-today discussion group at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/goldtoday --- You are currently subscribed to e-gold-list as: archive@jab.org To unsubscribe send a blank email to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
