These are actual warnings on products...
On a large folding cardboard sunshade for car windscreens:
"Do not attempt to operate vehicle with sunshade in
place."
In a VCR manual section about time recording programs:
"Only events in the future can be recorded on this
machine, not in the past. Resetting the clock to an
earlier time will not accurately record past events."
On a car lock which loops around both the clutch pedal and
the steering wheel:
"Warning -- Remove lock before driving."
On a packet of juggling balls:
"This product contains small granules under 3 millimeters.
Not suitable for children under the age of 14 years in
Europe or 8 years in the USA."
On a packet of Nytol sleeping tablets:
"Warning: may cause drowsiness."
On a packet of peanuts served on an internal flight in China
(written in both English and Chinese):
"Open packet and eat contents."
On 500g packets of Sainsbury's peanuts:
"Contains nuts."
Seen on a camera:
"This camera only works when there is a film inside."
On a bottle of flavored milk drink:
"After opening, keep upright."
On a can of windscreen de-icing spray:
"Spray works in sub-zero temperatures."
On a can of insect spray:
"Kills all kinds of insects!
Warning: This spray is harmful to bees."
A different brand of insect spray:
"Kills flies, wasps, mosquitoes, midges, and other flying
insects. Not tested on animals."
On an ocean buoy for determining the position of submarines:
"Protect from seawater."
On a Halloween Batman costume:
"This cape does not give the wearer the ability to fly.
On a Rowenta iron:
"Warning! Never iron clothes on the body!"
In the instructions for a Korean kitchen knife:
"Keep out of children."
On the "CycleAware" helmet-mounted mirror:
"Remember: Objects in the mirror are actually behind you."
Best wishes for the New Year,
Rich
ps: For colleagues in the USA...
Nominated for quote of the year is the statement made
by Representative Dick Armey who, when asked if he were
in the President's place would he resign, responded:
"If I were in the President's place I would not get a
chance to resign. I would be lying in a pool of my own
blood hearing Mrs. Armey standing over me saying, 'How
do I reload this damned thing?'"
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