When I used to run a features agency in Bombay, India, doing developmental
journalism, we released a feature on Domestic Violence. The writer was
supposed to list problems, solutions and name people who could act on the
suggestions, but came up against an impasse: battered women denied the
problem, saying it was a personal matter, and not one they couldn't deal
with. We were stumped for a while.

On a whim, I ran a small ad in the Indian Express, with a post box number,
seeking responses from men who believed that women were not for battery. In
the following 3 months, we received a total of nearly 800 letters from all
over the state of Maharashtra. They seemed to cut across all levels of
society � the youngest was 18, the oldest over 80; there were villagers who
could not write English and had someone write it for them, and there were
CEOs who dictated their letters to their secretaries.

I was stumped a second time, and the females on our team were sceptical.
They thought that many of these might be wife-batterers themselves
exonerating themselves through a public act of piety. At any rate, I had no
idea what to do with so many men who claimed to be against domestic
violence. As a way to weed out possible 'pretenders', I sent out a
questionnaire to explore their reasons for wanting to work against domestic
violence, their experience with it, and so on. I expected that most would
probably not take the trouble to reply.

I was wrong. We had nearly 80% returns on the questionnaires. This began to
get followed up with phone calls from men asking where we planned to take
all this. I consulted with the HRD departments of the Taj Hotels Group and
Unilever in Bombay, to see if they had any tips on what to do with several
hundred strangers who did not know each other but claimed to feel
passionately against violence towards women. No help there.

Finally, nearly 8 months after I had released the ad, I rented a hall and
invited the respondees. Only those in and around Bombay showed up, so we had
a roomful of about 80 to 100 men. After announcing that I saw my role as
facilitatory rather than as a leader, we allowed to express their hopes and
expectations. We ended with an agreement to meet again, and set a date.

To cut a long story short, I facilitated meetings between these men for
close to two years. During this period, the number dwindled, partly from
fatigue, partly from low interest. Eventually, there remained 8 stakeholders
who had proven their real interest by just being there through the process.
They formed a group called MAVA (Men Against Violence and Abuse), and sought
help from a social work institute to improve their counseling skills, better
understand the issues around domestic violence, and make plans.

I pulled away once the group had registered itself and begun activities.
MAVA is still active in Bombay, headed by Harish Sadani. I can post their
contact here if people are interested.

C Y Gopinath
Creative Director
Program for Appropriate Technology in Health
Nairobi.



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