Memorable quotes for Muriel's Wedding <http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110598/> (1994<http://www.imdb.com/Sections/Years/1994/> ) More at *IMDbPro* ยป<http://pro.imdb.com/rg/quotes-title/tconst-pro-header-link/title/tt0110598/> *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Sorry Mum. You know I love you, but you drive me crazy. And you three, what a bunch of cocksuckers. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: When I lived in Porpoise Spit, I used to sit in my room for hours and listen to ABBA songs. But since I've met you and moved to Sydney, I haven't listened to one Abba song. That's because my life is as good as an Abba song. It's as good as Dancing Queen. ------------------------------ *David <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0487406/>*: What kind of person marries someone they don't know? *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: You did. *David <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0487406/>*: I want to win. All my life I've wanted to win. *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: Me too. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: I can't stay married to you, David. I have to stop lying now. I've told so many lies... I don't love you. *David <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0487406/>*: I don't love you either, but I think I could like having you around. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: He said if I ever left him, he would find out who I was living with and shoot them. Then, he'd shoot me, then himself. *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Shit, he really loved you, didn't he? ------------------------------ *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: Why don't you come have a drink with us? Unlike some people, I tell it like it is. *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: The truth? Golly, I tell the truth, too. [*Rhonda glances at Nicole standing nearby*] *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Nicole's having an affair with Chook. Muriel saw them fucking in the laundry on your wedding day. Stick your drink up your arse, Tania. I'd rather swallow razor blades than have a drink with you. ------------------------------ *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: If I feel you've changed, I'll tell you. I'm honest. Unlike some people, I tell it like it is. ------------------------------ [*repeated line*] *Joanie <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0589613/>*: You're terrible, Muriel. ------------------------------ [*repeated line*] *Bill <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0402730/>*: Deidre Chambers. What a coincidence. ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: I had cancer... it's all right, they cut it out. *Cheryl <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0358774/>*: You were so full of life. *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: I'm not DEAD Cheryl. ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: You're right, you are a new person, and you stink. "Mariel VanArkle" stinks. And she's not half the person Muriel Heslop was. ------------------------------ *Bill <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0402730/>*: Did Perry interview for the police force yet? *Betty <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0238758/>*: Yes but they said he couldn't join because he was too tall. ------------------------------ *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: Well we, you know, and he couldn't so I... (makes hand to mouth gesture)... and I noticed there was lipstick on it. *Janine <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418917/>*: On what? *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: His dick. ------------------------------ *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: He says they're not sleeping together. She only sucks him off. *Cheryl <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0358774/>*: Why? *Tania <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0498275/>*: Out of respect for me. *Nicole <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0334886/>*: Bitch. ------------------------------ *Nicole <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0334886/>*: Muriel... *Cheryl <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0358774/>*: Wait. Let her finish her Orgasm. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: Bikkie? *Brice <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0206510/>*: Maybe after... I mean later. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: When I lived in Porpoise Spit, no one looked at me. But when I moved to Sydney, Brice asked me out and that proves that I changed and I'm not her anymore. *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Her? *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: Muriel! Muriel Heslop. Stupid, fat and useless. I hate her! I'm never going back to being her again! Why can't it be me? Why can't I be the one? ------------------------------ *Coach Ken Blundell <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0371824/>*: All the guests are on her side. I should have bought you more friends. ------------------------------ *Dierdre <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0627523/>*: Beauty Consultant. I advise women on their lipstick, base and eye liner. (to Japanese businessmen) But you should all know about make-up. Your wives must be geishas. ------------------------------ *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: Are you black? *David <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0487406/>*: What? ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: [*regarding her tumor*] How did I get it? I mean, it's nothing to do with too much sex is it? ------------------------------ *Nicole <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0334886/>*: People invite us to parties because they know we have a good time. We're mad. *Janine <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418917/>*: Pah-ty, pah-ty, pah-ty. *Nicole <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0334886/>*: It's our ee-mage. *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: We're mad! ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: I've seen your book. You've tried on every dress in Sydney! *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: That doesn't mean I'm gonna get married. *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Then what DOES it mean? *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: It means I WANT to get married. I've always wanted to get married. ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Cancer? Oh my God! I am gonna go bald and have to eat macrobiotic food! ------------------------------ *Bridal Manageress #2 <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0352517/>*: Now,now,now - just a minute - you can't come in here and threaten brides, I don't care how unfortunate, you are! *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Fuck off! ------------------------------ *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Are you Muriel Heslop? *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: No *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: Yes you are! *Muriel <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001057/>*: Why? *Rhonda <http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0341737/>*: I dunno why, you just are.
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