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Reminds me of "MAD" Magazine's - "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions!"
Amazing reply from CEO of JP Morgan.
A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?
I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here.. I'm 25 this year. I'm
very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k
annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of
$1M is considered only as middle class in New York . My requirement is not
high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary?
Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons
like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it
seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost
residential area on the west of New York City Garden ( ? ), $250k annual income
is not enough.
I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and
addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've met a few girls
who doesn't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich
guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend?
(my target now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty
Awesome reply:
Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out
there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your
situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k,
which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting
time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to
marry you.. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details
aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of 'beauty' and 'money': Person
A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there's
a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone
without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to
year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of
economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's
not just normal depreciation,
but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be
much worried 10 years later.
By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with
you is also a trading position'. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and
it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage
that you wanted.. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser
decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or 'leased'..
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but
will not marry you.
I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And
by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual
income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.
Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in 'leasing' services, do contact
me...
signed,
J.P. Morgan
Add more friends to your messenger and enjoy! Go to
http://messenger.yahoo.com/invite/
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