LAST ONE IS OUT OF THIS WORLD...DONT FORGET TO READ IT...
 
 
Actual call centre conversations !!!!! 

Customer:     'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get 
through to enquiries, can you help?'.
Operator:     'Where did you get that number from, sir?'. 
Customer:     'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'.
Operator:     'Sir, they are our opening hours'. 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 

Samsung Electronics 
Caller:          'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?' 
Operator:     'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking 
about'. 
Caller:          'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly 
states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC  wall socket and 
telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?' 

Operator:      'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
RAC Motoring Services 
Caller:          'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am 
travelling in Australia ?' 
Operator:      ' Doesn't the product name give you a clue?' 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France ): 
'If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering wheel 
to the other side of the car?' 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Directory Enquiries 
Caller:               'I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in 
Cardiff please'. 
Operator:          'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling 
correct?' 
Caller:               'Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but 
the 'B' fell off'. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven. 
Operator:        'Woven? Are you sure?' 
Caller:             'Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in 
Scotland '. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box 
told a worried operator: 
'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number 
on'. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Tech Support:      'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer:             'OK'.
Tech Support:      'Did you get a pop-up menu?'. 
Customer:             'No'.
Tech Support:      'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer:             'No'.
Tech Support:      'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until 
this point?'. 
Customer:            'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 
'click''. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Tech Support:          'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, 
can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer:                 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?' 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Caller:  'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised 
that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my 
file back again?'. 
---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
------------------------------------------- 
There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a 
long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is 
a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a 
recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the 
Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word 
Perfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'. 
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I 
know why they record these conversations!): 

Operator:         'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?' 
Caller:              'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.' 
Operator:         'What sort of trouble??' 
Caller:              'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden 
the words went away.' 
Operator:         'Went away?' 
Caller:              'They disappeared.' 
Operator:         'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?' 
Caller:              'Nothing.' 
Operator:         'Nothing??' 
Caller:              'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.' 
Operator:         'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??' 
Caller:              'How do I tell?' 
Operator:         'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??' 
Caller:              'What's a sea-prompt?' 
Operator:         'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the 
screen?' 
Caller:              'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept 
anything I type.' 
Operator:         'Does your monitor have a power indicator??' 
Caller:              'What's a monitor?' 
Operator:         'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a 
TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??' 
Caller:               'I don't know.' 
Operator:          'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find 
where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??' 
Caller:              'Yes, I think so.' 
Operator:         'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's 
plugged into the wall. 
Caller:              'Yes, it is.'
Operator:         'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that 
there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??' 
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again 
and find the other cable.' 
Caller:               'Okay, here it is.'
Operator:          'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely 
into the back of your computer.' 
Caller:               'I can't reach.'
Operator:          'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean 
way over??' 
Caller:               'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - 
it's because it's dark.'
Operator:          'Dark??'
Caller:               'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I 
have is coming in from the window. 
' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller:               'I can't.'
Operator:          'No? Why not??'
Caller:               'Because there's a power failure.' 
Operator:  'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it 
licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer 
came in??' 
Caller:               'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.' 
Operator:           'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it 
up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you 
bought it from.'
Caller:                'Really? Is it that bad?' 
Operator:            'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller:                 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell 
them??'
Operator:            'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a 
computer!!!!!' 

 



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